Monday, May 11, 2009

Wanda Sykes was Funny

THE ABSURD TIMES



Everybody has to loosen up a bit. Wanda Sykes was funny at the White House Correspondents Dinner. Her delivery was great for her material and, the real test, she got great laughs. If they laugh, it is funny. that's it.


"Dick Cheney says he hopes this country fails. Well I hope his kidneys fail -- how 'bout that?"


Not "over the line." Every worthwhile comedian, by the way, is attacked by those he (or she) skewers. LBJ and Nixon didn't find Mort Sahl very funny, either.


tha's all

Tuesday, May 05, 2009


THE ABSURD TIMES


LEST WE FORGET, Obama is meeting with Israeli functionaries today, so it is probably a good time to refresh our memory about what has been going on in our name:

One Voice: manufacturing consent for Israeli apartheid

How do Palestinians living under Israeli military occupation and siege see their world, especially after Israel's massacre of more than 1,400 people, mostly civilians, in the occupied Gaza Strip three months ago?

Two recent surveys shed light on this question, although one -- published on 22 April by the pro-Israel organization One Voice -- appears intended to influence international opinion in a direction more amenable to Israel, rather than to record faithfully the views of Palestinians or Israelis ("OV Poll: Popular Mandate for Negotiated Two State Solution," accessed 30 April 2009). The other -- a more credible survey -- was published in March by the Oslo-based Fafo Institute for Applied International Studies and funded by the Norwegian government ("Surveying Palestinian opinions March 2009," accessed 30 April 2009).

The One Voice survey (of 500 Israelis and 600 Palestinians conducted from November to February) received considerable media attention. The group's press release unabashedly spun the results to claim popular legitimacy for the two-state solution and to discredit alternatives: "The results indicate that 74 [percent] of Palestinians and 78 [percent] of Israelis are willing to accept a two state solution (an option rated on a range from 'tolerable' to 'essential'), while 59 [percent] of Palestinians and 66 [percent] of Israelis find a single bi-national state 'unacceptable.'"

The press release failed to note that 53 percent of Palestinians polled were also willing to embrace or tolerate "one joint state" (as opposed to a federated "bi-national" state) in which "Israelis and Palestinians are equal citizens." Curiously, Israelis were not asked about this option. The high-level of potential support for a single democratic state (confirmed by Fafo as we shall see) is remarkable given the incessant drumbeat of peace process industry propaganda that there is no solution but the two-state solution. One Voice asserts that a "very conscious effort was made in this poll to cover as wide a range of potential solutions as possible." But except for the initial question about the type of state, all the other questions assume, and are primarily relevant to, a two-state solution.

Colin Irwin, of the Institute of Irish Studies at the University of Liverpool, who authored the One Voice poll, has written that his techniques were used to help politicians shape political agreements in Northern Ireland and the Balkans. The method consists of using polls to "explore" opinions on each side of a divide and find areas where there is consensus and on which an agreement could be built. Such an approach might have some relevance among two equal communities, but the way he has applied it here merely legitimizes and obscures the radically unequal power relations between Israelis and Palestinians rather than providing a way to transcend them.

It is only through a stretched interpretation that One Voice manages to find a consensus around a "two-state solution" -- which looks suspiciously like long-standing Israeli proposals for a Palestinian bantustan. The treatment of refugees is a good example of this questionable approach. The poll finds that 87 percent of Palestinians under occupation consider the "right of return AND compensation" for refugees to be "essential" to a final agreement, but notes that this option was "rejected by 77 [percent] of Israelis as unacceptable." Therefore, the Palestinian preference is pushed off the table in favor of a proposal where Israel "recognizes the suffering of refugees," and all but a handful can return only to the West Bank and Gaza Strip. Thus, Israeli bigotry against non-Jewish Palestinian refugees is accorded the status of a "preference" that must not only be respected, but trumps the Palestinians' universally recognized legal rights.

This special privilege is often granted to Israelis but not to others. In Bosnia and Herzegovina, for example, the UN High Commissioner for Refugees assisted hundreds of thousands of refugees to return to their original homes, many in areas dominated by hostile majority communities. It did not matter if those majorities did not want to see refugees from another group return; rather it was the refugee's individual right -- a universal human right -- that trumped appeals to ethno-national purity.

The One Voice survey does confirm that the minimal consensus needed to sustain a two-state solution, were it practicable, is absent. While 78 percent of Palestinian respondents considered a full Israeli withdrawal from the occupied territories to the June 1967 line "essential," 60 percent of Israelis consider that "unacceptable." Predictably, the proposed "compromise" is that Israel withdraws partially. Once again 60 percent of Israelis are allowed to outvote 78 percent of Palestinians in order to maintain Israeli control of land occupied, colonized and annexed in violation of international law.

Thus, One Voice's analysis treats universal rights and international law as having less weight than Israeli prejudices and legitimizes the "facts on the ground" established through criminal behavior in open violation of UN resolutions and the International Court of Justice. It subjects these rights to a popular referendum in which the abusers exercise a permanent veto over the claims of their victims.

One Voice bills itself as "an international mainstream grassroots movement" commanding the support of hundreds of thousands of Palestinians and Israelis. In fact, One Voice has support from no Palestinian grassroots organizations. It is a slick marketing outfit funded, according to its website, by "Israeli, Palestinian and other" sources. Much of its money comes from "major foundations" such as the Ford Foundation, IBM, and the Rockefeller Brothers Fund. One Voice also boasts of receiving money from "businessmen" including Yasser Abbas, the son of Fatah leader Mahmoud Abbas, who has been plagued by allegations of corruption.

Among One Voice board members are State Department Special Advisor Dennis Ross, former Israeli Deputy Defense Minister Efraim Sneh, and former Israeli military ruler of the occupied West Bank General Danny Rothschild, in addition to many American Zionists, some Hollywood celebrities and a few token Palestinians. In October 2007, One Voice canceled a planned "peace concert" in Jericho after the Palestinian Campaign for the Academic and Cultural Boycott of Israel (PACBI) called on Palestinians to withhold their support. At the time, PACBI asserted that the concert was "being organized to promote a 'peace' agreement that is devoid of the minimal requirements of justice," and was nothing more than a "public relations charade."

One Voice's modus operandi is to recruit college students to sign a "Commitments Platform" pledging support for a two-state solution, but as PACBI pointed out, the statement is "without any commitment to international parameters -- assumes equal responsibility of 'both sides' for the 'conflict,' and suspiciously fails to call for Israel's full compliance with its obligations under international law through ending its illegal military occupation, its denial of Palestinian refugee rights (particularly the right of return), and its system of racial discrimination against its own Palestinian citizens." It is based on these signatures that One Voice claims to represent the "grassroots." Oddly, the platform has recently been removed from the official One Voice website.

There is a laudable intent to Irwin's polling approach. It attempts to identify ideas that could appeal to Israelis and Palestinians. Ultimately any new order must be able to gain consent. But the choice to exclude justice, law and rights from shaping an agreement is not a neutral one; it is in effect an affirmative choice to include, legitimize and endorse the permanence of injustice and inequality. But that is what One Voice's agenda has been all along.

Two-state solution loses support as Western strategy fails

The Fafo survey of more than 1,800 Palestinians in the Gaza Strip and almost 1,500 in the West Bank offers some real insights into the state of Palestinian public opinion in the Occupied Palestinian Territories (international funders never sponsor surveys of all Palestinians, which would include those inside Israel as well as those in the Diaspora).

Fafo found that just 35 percent of Palestinians still support a two-state solution. One third preferred an Islamic state throughout Palestine, and 20 percent wanted "one state with equal rights for all," in Palestine/Israel.

Palestinians did not even agree with the common claim that the two-state solution is clearly the more "pragmatic" and "achievable" one. In the West Bank, 64 percent thought the two-state solution was "very" or "somewhat" realistic, as against 55 percent for a single democratic state. In Gaza, 80 percent considered a single democratic state to be "very" or "somewhat" realistic as against 71 percent for a two-state state solution. This is a moment when no vision carries a consensus among Palestinians, underscoring the urgent need for an inclusive debate about all possible democratic outcomes.

The American effort, started by the Bush Administration with European and Arab accomplices, and continued by US President Barack Obama, to impose an Israeli-friendly Palestinian leadership has failed. The Fafo survey indicates that Hamas emerged from Israel's attack on Gaza with enhanced support and legitimacy.

Palestinian Authority leaders in Ramallah and their Arab, Israeli and Western allies, did all they could to portray the Israeli attack on Gaza as the result of "recklessness" and provocation by Hamas and other resistance factions. This narrative has taken hold among a minority: 19 percent of Palestinians in the West Bank and Gaza Strip viewed Hamas as having "great" responsibility for the attack on Gaza (this rose to 40 percent among Fatah supporters). Overall, 51 percent agreed that Hamas had no responsibility at all for the attack (48 percent in the West Bank, 58 percent in Gaza). Just over half of those polled agreed with the statement "All Palestinian factions must stop firing rockets at Israel."

All the financial, diplomatic and armed support given by the West to Mahmoud Abbas, the Fatah leader whose term as Palestinian Authority president expired in January, has done little to shore up his standing among Palestinians. Only 44 percent of respondents overall (41 percent in the West Bank) considered him the "legitimate" president of the Palestinians, while 56 percent did not.

Near universal dissatisfaction with the Western-backed Palestinian Authority in Ramallah is reflected in the finding that 87 percent of respondents agreed that it was time for Fatah to change its leadership. Unsurprisingly, 93 percent of Hamas supporters wanted change, but so did 78 percent of Fatah supporters.

Palestinians expressed very low confidence in institutions (by far the most trusted were UNRWA -- the UN agency for Palestine refugees -- and the satellite channel Al-Jazeera). But a plurality in the West Bank and Gaza Strip -- 32 percent overall -- considered Prime Minister Ismail Haniyeh's Western-boycotted Hamas-led government in Gaza to be the legitimate Palestinian government. Only a quarter overall (31 percent in Gaza, 22 percent in the West Bank) thought the Ramallah-based "emergency" government headed by Abbas's appointed and US-backed Prime Minister Salam Fayyad was the legitimate one.

Hamas leaders performed well during and after Israel's attack on Gaza. Haniyeh had an overall positive rating of 58 percent while Abbas's was only 41 percent. But among Palestinians who said they would vote in an election, 41 percent would support Fatah against 31 percent for Hamas. If that was out of step with the rest of the survey, there is a clear trend: support for Fatah was down sharply from a year earlier and Hamas doubled its support in the West Bank from 16 to 29 percent, according to Fafo.

There were some issues on which there was a strong consensus. Ninety-three percent of respondents wanted to see a "national unity government" formed, and the vast majority (85 percent) rejected maintaining the West Bank and Gaza Strip as "independent regions" if efforts to form one foundered.

Palestinians still overwhelmingly support a negotiated settlement, but the "peace process" and its sponsors have lost all credibility. Just one percent thought the US had a "great deal" of concern for the Palestinian cause, and 77 percent thought it had none at all. The "Quartet," the self-appointed ad hoc grouping of US, EU, UN and Russian representatives that monopolizes peace efforts earns the trust of just 13 percent of Palestinians.





The United States and Gaza

THE COURAGEOUS ISRAELI journalist Amira Hass, in her 1996 book Drinking the Sea at Gaza, tells us that in Israeli slang "go to Gaza" means "go to hell."[1]

She wrote these words long before the murderous economic blockade imposed on Gaza, and also before the 23 days of savage violence that we've just witnessed, making Gaza a living hell not just in the Israeli imagination, but in reality.

But in creating this nightmare for the people of Gaza, Israel didn't act alone.

It had the support of Egypt, which kept the Rafah crossing closed. It had the support of the European Union, which joined in the shunning of the elected representatives of the Palestinian people.

And most importantly, Israel had the decisive support of the U.S. government. Many of the weapons used by the Israelis in their ferocious assault were provided by the United States: the aircraft, the helicopters, the bunker-buster missiles. But the United States provided as well crucial diplomatic backing, making sure that no resolution would emerge from the Security Council that could interfere with Israel's agenda.

To understand the role the United States played as Israel's enabler in Gaza, we need to look more generally at what Washington hopes to achieve in the Middle East. The key for the United States is control of oil: what the State Dept. in 1945 called "a stupendous source of strategic power and one of the greatest material prizes in world history."[2] And this concern to control the region's oil is no less true today than it was in 1945.[3]

Over the years U.S. control of Middle East oil has faced many challenges. First, there was the competition from other major powers, especially Britain and France. So, following World War II, the United States moved to push these latter two countries out of Saudi Arabia.

In 1956, Washington opposed the UK-French-Israeli aggression against Egypt, keeping its capitalist rivals from reasserting their presence in the region. And in 2003, an important undercurrent to the war on Iraq was U.S. competition with France and Russia over Iraqi oil.

But the most important challenge to U.S. control of Middle East oil has been the people of the Middle East. In the early 1950s, a democratically-elected Iranian government nationalized the British oil company there, as it was legally entitled to do under international law. Washington and London responded by a boycott of Iranian oil, which brought Iran's economy to the brink of collapse. Then the CIA and British intelligence organized a coup, entrenching a quarter-century dictatorship under the Shah and effectively denationalizing the oil company, with U.S. firms getting 40% of the formerly 100% British-owned company.

This was, in the view of the New York Times, an "object lesson in the heavy cost that must be paid" when an oil rich Third World nation "goes berserk with fanatical nationalism."[4]

Boots on the Ground

For U.S. policymakers, therefore, the question has always been how can they assure their control of this most valuable resource and defend it against all challengers, but particularly against those berserk fanatical nationalists, which is to say the people of the region.

One day policymakers hope that technology will allow Washington to target enemies anywhere in the world with robotic killer drones, but until that happy day arrives U.S. intimidation has required military bases in the Middle East. The problem, however, is that Middle Eastern public opinion is extremely hostile to the idea of foreign military bases, which its people see -- rightly -- as a serious infringement on their independence.

Until 1962 the United States had a major base in Saudi Arabia, the Dhahran Air Field. It was called "Air Field" rather than "Air Base" because of Saudi sensitivities to anything that smacked of imperialism. But by 1962 nationalist pressure made continued use of this base untenable.

Another major U.S. base was in Libya: Wheelus Air Base. But in 1964, under nationalist pressure, the United States agreed that it would leave that too, and in 1969 the Libyan ruler Qaddafi ordered them to withdraw forthwith.

U.S. forces did come back to Saudi Arabia in 1991 and stayed until 2003 -- but that military presence served as a major recruiter for al-Qaeda and impetus for 9-11.

For some U.S. policy makers, Iraq seemed like an ideal place for a base, right in the heart of the world's most strategic region. But they ran into a problem: not so much the military resistance, but the nonviolent resistance. This resistance was first mobilized by Ayatollah Sistani, which forced the Bush administration to agree to elections -- which they hadn't wanted to allow.[5]

The elected government subsequently forced Washington to accept a status-of-forces agreement that puts a sharp time-limit on the continued presence of U.S. forces.[6] Whether Washington will yet be able to reverse this agreement remains to be seen, but in any event, it is clear that the Middle East is a crucial region for policy makers, but one where it has been difficult to reliably base U.S. forces.

The Largest Aircraft Carrier

This is where Israel comes in. Israel is, in some respects, the largest U.S. aircraft carrier in the world¸ from which U.S.-made planes with U.S.-made weaponry can bombard U.S. enemies from Israeli bases with Israeli pilots.

It is sometimes argued that "if the United States were truly interested in the Middle East's oil it would support the Arabs over Israel." But this is the wrong way to look at things. It's not a question of Israel vs. "the Arabs," but Israel and the pro-American oil oligarchs against any radical and nationalist Arab regimes that might threaten U.S. control of oil.

So in 1959, when Egypt and Iraq were both ruled by nationalist regimes, a memorandum for the National Security Council stated that "if we choose to combat radical Arab nationalism and to hold Persian Gulf oil by force if necessary, a logical corollary would be to support Israel as the only strong pro-West power left in the Near East."[7]

With the 1967 war, the U.S.-Israeli alliance began in earnest. On the eve of that war, Egypt and Saudi Arabia were locked in a proxy war in Yemen. Saudi Arabia, with U.S. help, was backing the Yemeni royalists, while Egypt was backing more militant elements. Israel's defeat of Egypt and Syria, both armed by the Soviet Union, was seen by Washington officials as a major contribution to U.S. foreign policy.

When Nixon and Kissinger took office in 1969, they too viewed Israel as a Cold War ally that (along with Iran and Saudi Arabia) could tame Soviet-backed regimes of the Middle East. Sen. Henry "Scoop" Jackson put it this way:

"Such stability as now obtains in the Middle East is, in my view, largely the result of the strength and Western orientation of Israel on the Mediterranean and Iran on the Persian Gulf. These two countries, reliable friends of the United States, together with Saudi Arabia, have served to inhibit and contain those irresponsible and radical elements in certain Arab states -- such as Syria, Libya, Lebanon and Iraq -- who, were they free to do so, would pose a grave threat indeed to our principal sources of petroleum in the Persian Gulf."[8]

In 1979, when the pro-American Shah of Iran was replaced by an anti-American theocratic regime, Israel became even more important to U.S. planners.

Converging Interests

There are claims by some people, including some on the left, that Washington DC is "Israeli-occupied territory" -- that the Israel lobby controls U.S. foreign policy, that the Israeli tail wags the U.S. dog and not the other way around. This view seems to me to misunderstand the way power works.

There is no doubt that the U.S. and Israeli governments are very close allies. What that means is that they have common interests. It means they sometimes defer to each other: allies do that. They cooperate in many areas: they share a great deal of weapons production; they share a great deal of intelligence; the United States provides military aid; throughout the Cold War Israel provided Soviet weapons, captured from Arab armies, for use by U.S. client forces.

This is a close alliance, but that's different from saying that Israel, through the Israel Lobby, controls U.S. policy. The Lobby is powerful. But it is not decisive.

You can't tell "who controls who" if you only look at issues where the interests of the two are the same. But when their interests diverge -- as, for example, over the issue of the Israeli sale of military technology to China -- it was easy to see who was boss: the United States imposed sanctions, got Israel to stop its planned arms deal with China, and got Israel to issue a public apology and remove senior defense officials.[9]

Such divergences are rare. In general the two governments have the same interests:

• Both the United States and Israel want to defang radical Arab regimes.

• Both use democratic rhetoric but would much rather have a dictatorial regime -- like that of Mubarak -- than an elected regime where the wrong people get elected.

• Both ally themselves with Islamic fundamentalism when it suits their interests: after all, Saudi Arabia is today probably the most fundamentalist regime in the world, and one of Washington's closest allies. Israel was happy to support Hamas when they viewed the main threat as the secular Palestine Liberation Organization. And the United States was happy to support Afghan mujahedin against the Soviet Union.

For both what's important is not democracy or secularism, but subservience. During the Reagan administration the United States and Israel would not deal with the PLO. But both of them would be prepared to do so if the PLO would first capitulate. Here's how Secretary of State George P. Shultz put it:

"In one place Arafat was saying, 'unc, unc, unc' and in another he was saying, 'cle, cle, cle,' but nowhere will he yet bring himself to say, 'Uncle.'"[10]

And therefore the United States would oppose him. Only in December 1988, did Shultz conclude that "Arafat finally said 'Uncle'," and thus Washington was now prepared to deal with him.

When Hamas won the elections to the Palestinian Legislative Council in January 2006, it was obvious why Israel would oppose them: They were much less likely to sell out Palestinian national interests -- out of both conviction and a lack of corruption. And Washington too wanted Palestinians to be led by those who had said "uncle," not advocates of "fanatical nationalism."

Why does the United States care about some localized Palestinian fanatics? For the past several years, the country that has most stood in the way of U.S. domination of the Middle East has been Iran. Going to war with Iran would be a disaster from any point of view, but that doesn't mean that policymakers don't want to intimidate and threaten Tehran.

That's why the United States has been engaged in all sorts of measures short, of direct military action, to try to destabilize Iran -- why even Barack Obama, an advocate of talking to all countries, says he keeps the military option on the table.

But as long as Iran has allies -- Hizbollah in Lebanon and Hamas in Palestine -- any military strike on Iran would leave Israel vulnerable to retaliation, thus lessening the intimidation factor. And that's why Washington supported Israel's war against Hizbollah in 2006: making sure, as they did with Gaza, that no UN resolution would interfere with teaching Hizbollah a lesson.

It turned out that the attempt to teach Hizbollah a lesson was a failure, but not for want of trying on the part of Israel and the Bush administration. By defeating Iran's allies, Israel and the United States hope to make Iran more subject to intimidation.

In Gaza, the attempt to unseat Hamas began with economic sanctions. When these failed, Israel and the United States went to plan B: supporting a military coup against Hamas in Gaza. The U.S. role in this is now well documented.[11]

But the coup failed, and led in fact to Hamas seizing full power in Gaza. Israel, with U.S. backing, then enacted a crippling blockade. That too failed to reduce support for Hamas. Now we have this latest barbarous Israeli attack on Gaza.

Truth and Lies on Gaza

There was a recent article by Henry Siegman, a former national director of the American Jewish Congress and of the Synagogue Council of America. Called "Israel's Lies,"[12] it compellingly exposed the lies Israel has used to justify this attack. But we need to add that these same lies were advanced by the U.S. government:

Israel and the United States claimed that Hamas broke the calm, the ceasefire. No, Israel broke it, on November 4, 2008.[13]

Israel and the United States claimed that Hamas refused to renew the ceasefire when it expired in mid-December. No, Hamas was prepared to extend the ceasefire if the murderous blockade of Gaza were lifted,[14] as was supposed to happen during the ceasefire and as ought to have happened on moral grounds in any event.

Israel and the United States claimed that Israel took every precaution to avoid civilian casualties, but:

• You don't avoid civilian casualties when you use white phosphorus, flechettes, and 155 mm. artillery shells in the most densely populated area in the world.[15]

• You don't avoid civilian casualties when you intentionally target civilian police,[16] or government buildings.[17]

You don't avoid civilian casualties when your approach is, in the words of an Israeli commander, "We are very violent. We do not balk at any means to protect the lives of our soldiers."[18]

• Israel and the United States say that all civilian deaths are to be blamed on Hamas for using civilian shields. Now so far we only have Israel's word for it that Hamas used civilians in this way -- and we do know that Israel kept out independent observers and that when Human Rights Watch was able to examine similar Israeli claims in the 2006 Lebanon war, they found the claims to be false.[19] But even if such claims were confirmed, international humanitarian law is quite clear that an enemy's mingling of military and civilian assets does not remove the attacking side's legal obligation to ensure that no undue harm comes to civilians.[20]

Obama: So What's New?

On January 20, the Obama administration took office, promising change. What can we expect from him?

One good sign was that Israel called off its assault before the inauguration. This suggested that perhaps Israeli leaders weren't sure, despite Obama's campaign statements, that the new president would give them the absolute backing given them by Bush.

Another good sign is that we see some movement among important elites. Thus, the Council on Foreign Relations and the Saban Center of the Brookings Institute issued a joint report[21] suggesting that the United States modify its conditions for talking to Hamas -- namely that it recognize Israel, renounce violence, and accept all previous agreements. These conditions were always bogus -- since they were never accepted by Israel and the United States.[22]

The report rightly recognizes that no peace can come to Palestine unless Hamas is part of the process. Now I hope that the Palestinian people will one day vote out both Hamas and Fatah: but today the elected representative of the Palestinians is not Mahmoud Abbas, whose term as president expired a month ago, or his illegally appointed prime minister,[23] but Hamas.

Those are the good signs. Unfortunately the bad signs outweigh them.

• The Obama administration has repeated and underlined the three conditions.

• Clinton has said the current problem is Hamas firing rockets, which -- aside from the fact that Hamas is not firing rockets, other groups are[24] -- still ignores the immoral collective punishment of the continuing blockade.[25]

• And even though Obama has made a few positive references to the Arab Peace Initiative (API), he has done so in a most depressing way. The API was an offer from all the Arab states that if Israel withdrew to the 1967 borders and allowed the establishment of a Palestinian state with East Jerusalem as its capital, they would all extend diplomatic recognition to Israel. So Obama said he liked part of the API: not the withdrawal part, not the Palestinian state part, but that the Arab states should all recognize Israel.[26]

So at this point it's hard to be very optimistic about what Obama will do. But we need to keep in mind that his actions are not pre-determined. What he does is at least in part a function of what we do. If we get out information and mobilize people, maybe we can build enough pressure to put an end to Washington's blank check for Israel. And if we can do that, there's a chance to end the hell on Earth that Israel has created for Palestinians.

Notes

1. Amira Hass, Drinking the Sea at Gaza, New York: Owl Books, 1996, 9.

2. Quoted in Noam Chomsky, Hegemony and Survival, Metropolitan Books, 2003, 150.

3. The United States is not dependent on Middle East oil today (it gets most of its supply from the Western Hemisphere and Africa) just as it was not dependent on Middle East oil in 1945 (when the United States was the world's largest oil producer). Then, as now, the crucial issue was whether Washington could so control global oil supply that it would have leverage over other states, especially its capitalist competitors.

4. Quoted in Joe Stork, Middle East Oil and the Energy Crisis, New York: Monthly Review Press, 1975, 74.

5. See, for example, Gilbert Achcar, "On the forthcoming election in Iraq," ZNet, Jan. 3, 2005; Noam Chomsky, "Obama's Emerging Policies on Israel, Iraq and the Economic Crisis: An Interview with Press TV," Counterpunch, Jan. 28, 2009.

6. Patrick Cockburn, "America Concedes," London Review of Books, Dec. 18, 2008.

7. Chomsky, Hegemony and Survival, 164.

8. Stork, Middle East Oil and the Energy Crisis, 215-16.

9. See Marc Perelman, "Israel Miffed Over Lingering China Flap," Forward, Oct. 7, 2005. As Haaretz's military correspondent Ze'ev Schiff reported, "Israel maneuvered itself into a situation where its friends in the administration and in Congress cannot, or do not wish to, help it in this matter." ("A Shallow Strategic Dialogue," Haaretz, July 29, 2005.)

10. See George P. Shultz, Turmoil and Triumph: My Years as Secretary of State, New York: Charles Scribner's Sons, 1993, 1043.

11. David Rose, "The Gaza Bombshell," Vanity Fair, April 2008.

12. Henry Siegman, "Israel's Lies," London Review of Books, Jan. 29, 2009.

13. Rory McCarthy, "Gaza truce broken as Israeli raid kills six Hamas gunmen," Guardian, Nov. 5, 2008.

14. Jimmy Carter, "The Unnecessary War," Washington Post, Jan. 8, 2009, A15.

15. Amnesty International (AI), "Israel used white phosphorus in Gaza civilian areas," 1/19/09; AI, "Israeli army used flechettes against Gaza civilians," Jan. 27, 2009; Human Rights Watch (HRW), "Israel: Stop Shelling Crowded Gaza City," Jan. 16, 2009.

16. HRW, "Israel/Hamas: Civilians Must Not Be Targets; Disregard for Civilians Underlies Current Escalation," Dec. 30, 2008 ("Under the laws of war, police and police stations are presumptively civilian unless the police are Hamas fighters or taking a direct part in the hostilities, or police stations are being used for military purposes.")

17. Tova Dadon, "Deputy chief of staff: Worst still ahead," Ynet, Dec. 29, 2008, (quoting Brigadier General Dan Harel as saying "We are hitting not only terrorists and launchers, but also the whole Hamas government and all its wings.... We are hitting government buildings.... After this operation there will not be one Hamas building left standing in Gaza....").

18. Amos Harel and Avi Issacharoff, "Israel and Hamas are both paying a steep price in Gaza," Haaretz, 1/10/2009.

19. HRW, Fatal Strikes: Israel's Indiscriminate Attacks Against Civilians in Lebanon, Aug. 2, 2006.

20. HRW, "Q & A on Hostilities between Israel and Hamas," Dec. 31, 2008 ("...the attacking party is not relieved from its obligation to take into account the risk to civilians simply because it considers the defending party responsible for having located legitimate military targets within or near populated areas. That is, the presence of a Hamas commander or military facility in a populated area would not justify attacking the area without regard to the threatened civilian population.").

21. Richard N. Haass and Martin Indyk, Restoring the Balance: A Middle East Strategy for the Next President, Washington, DC: Brookings Institution Press, 2008, executive summaries ("the United States should be willing to drop its insistence that Hamas accept the Quartet's criteria"). A related positive sign is that Chas W. Freeman Jr. is reported to be the intended appointee as chair of the National Intelligence Council (NIC). Freeman has been an advocate of dealing with Hamas. See, for example, this report: David Lev, "New U.S. Intel Chief: Support of Israel Not a U.S. Interest," Arutz Sheva (Israel National News), Feb. 23, 2009.

22. See questions 9 and 10 of my "Question and Answer on Gaza," ZNet, Jan. 16, 2009.

23. Reuters, "TEXT-Opinion of lawyer who drafted Palestinian law," July 8, 2007.

24. Barak Ravid, "MI Chief: Hamas upholding cease-fire, but smaller Gaza groups undeterred," Haaretz, Feb. 1, 2009.

25. See Hillary Rodham Clinton, Remarks With Reporters in the Correspondents' Room, Jan. 27, 2009 ("of course, we're concerned about the humanitarian suffering. We're concerned any time innocent civilians, Palestinian or Israeli, are attacked. That's why we support Israel's right to self-defense. The rocket barrages, which are getting closer and closer to populated areas, cannot go unanswered."); Remarks by Secretary Clinton and Special Envoy Mitchell After Their Meeting, Feb. 3, 2009 ("our conditions with respect to Hamas have not and will not change. ... Hamas knows that it must stop the rocket fire into Israel. There were rockets yesterday, there were rockets this morning. And it is very difficult to ask any nation to do anything other than defend itself in the wake of that kind of consistent attack.")

26. Remarks by the President to State Department Employees, Jan. 22, 2009 ("...the Arab Peace Initiative contains constructive elements.... Now -- now is the time for Arab states to act on the initiatives promised by supporting the Palestinian government under President Abbas and Prime Minister Fayyad, taking steps towards normalizing relations with Israel, and by standing up to extremism that threatens us all.") See also Chomsky, "Obama's Emerging Policies on Israel, Iraq and the Economic Crisis."

Stephen R. Shalom teaches political science at William Paterson University in New Jersey. He serves on the editorial board of New Politics and works with ZNet, where is "Question and Answer on Gaza" was recently posted. He edited a collection of dialogues on the Middle East between Noam Chomsky and Gilbert Achcar, Perilous Power (Paradigm). This is a slightly revised and footnoted version of a talk given at New York University on February 6, 2009 as part of a program sponsored by the Radical Film and Lecture Series.


From: Z Net - The Spirit Of Resistance Lives
URL: http://www.zcommunications.org/znet/viewArticle/21368






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Post-Gaza, Palestinians hold jaundiced views of all Western countries and the Arab states aligned with them. Iran and Turkey, which took strong public stands in solidarity with Palestinians, have seen support surge.

If the Fafo poll confirms that the Western-backed effort to destroy Hamas, impose quisling leaders, and blockade and punish Palestinians until they submit to Israel's demands has failed, a useful conclusion from the One Voice survey is that given a free choice, Israelis reject all solutions requiring them to give up their monopoly on power and to respect Palestinian rights and international law.

The right response to such findings is to support the growing international solidarity campaign of boycott, divestment and sanctions to force Israel to abandon its illegal, supremacist and colonial practices, and to build a vision of a democratic future for all the people in the country.


Co-founder of The Electronic Intifada, Ali Abunimah is author of One Country: A Bold Proposal to End the Israeli-Palestinian Impasse (Metropolitan Books, 2006).

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Poor Dick

THE ABSURD TIMES
Illustration: Maybe this is what is going on in his mind?

Of late, a tireless public servant has been subject to a plethora of attacks from what can only be described as spiteful and malignant critics of his dedication to, and faithful execution of, his awesome and demanding duties as the former Vice-President of the United States of America. The most recent attacks come as a response to his appearance on the F* News Channel as part of his promotion of both himself and his book, both of which are titled DICK. His interviews were conducted by a male with a low forehead with an Irish sounding name, best known as H*. This Dick had remained secreted for most of the past eight years in "Secret" locations and, both to his credit as eminently self-effacing and humble, said very little in public. To be sure, ever since his appearance at the inauguration in a wheel chair, it has been difficult to see him or hear him without thinking of the Stanley Kubrick film, Dr. Strangelove.

Much of this criticism is a result of his defense of "enhanced interrogation," a procedure that many critics call "torture," and we know quite well that ex-President George W. Bush said that we "do not torture." The problem the critics have is in understanding the definition of torture and this definition depends greatly upon ones point of view, or who is involved. For example, if Mr. Cheney were flogged and had needles stuck under his fingernails and other pain inflicted upon him until he confessed, I am sure he would consider that torture. However, if it is done to someone else, he would not consider it torture. Since Mr. Cheney was never waterboarded, nor was Mr. Bush for that matter, no torture was practiced by the United States. His critics simply miss that very obvious point.

He is also providing another service to his country gratis: he is carefully and thoughtfully, at no charge to us, letting us know how Mr. Obama has jeapordized national security. It may not have been clear to those watching our President's visit to the southern regions of the continent, but he actually shook hands with Mr. Chavez. While Mr. Cheney was not specific about the particular dangers this posed to us and our loved ones, he has at least warned us to that when the impending doom descends upon us, we were prepared. To compound matters, Mr. Obama actually accepted a book from him. There seems to be no end to the perfidity of our President's lack of vigilance, but we at least have DICK looking over us.

Another tremendous threat to our national security and completely incomprehensible failing, Mr. DICK points out to us is the absurdity of Mr. Eric Holder, the current Attorney General, in adhering to the law as is required by that most evil of documents, the United State's Consitituion. Of course one swears on a bible to uphold the Constitution, that is expected, but to actually be so naieve as to attempt to do it leaves him at a complete loss. He was never once quilty of defending that document and its outdated ideas – why he even was industrious enough to help defeat its purpose.

Yet with all his virtues and stature, there is a dark, forboding force that shrouds his good name, a force that he was able to avoid and ignore while he retained the powers of office, but seems all but certain to doom him to eternal condemnation in the eyes of the cilivized world, the wretched evil called "the facts." For example, it has been well-known that "torture" (for that is what everyone else other than he and F* news calls it, produces nothing of value and that all the useful information obtained from any Al-Qaeda types was obtained before any torture was employed on them. So what possible reason could there be to torture some of them as much as six times a day?

Well, these techniques were borrowed by us from the Korean/Chinese who used them to obtain false confessions – in fact, that is the only possible use for torture (other than a sadistic pleasure – actually, Ms. England, the short female with the leash in the Abu Garahib photos was probably punished not because of committing torture, but for enjoying it). It was quite important for Mr. Cheney to establish a connection between Saddam Hussein and Bin Laden.

Now, nothing could be more far-fetched than that. From what is obvious concerning Saddam's personality and beliefs, some upstart fundamentalist Wahabbi could hardly be anything but anathema to him, especially if that fundamentalist had thoughts of grandeur. After all, all grandeur belong to Saddam, the Saladin of the modern world. Bin Ladin, indeed.

However, we could try to torture some of his followers to confess to many ties. Unfortunately, even under torture they found the thought too ridiculous to take seriously.

And that, dear world, is why the DICK will never be known as anything more than the DICK.

Sic transit glorius mundi

Finally, remember Obama's senate race? His original opponent had to drop out because his wife complained that he was subjecting, or trying to subject, her to lewd and lascivious behavior. It is not clear what that behavior was, but I came across a photo of her and her situation in that photo is NOT what she was complaining about – she was complaining about more. So, out of deference to those on the mailing list who might have a problem with her "objectification," I have posted the photo on the site itself and refrained sending it through the e-mail. However, if you want to see it and then speculate what he was after, just click on the link, below. He, by the way, was replaced by the insane Alan Keyes (not as husband, but a Republican opponent).

Saturday, April 18, 2009

Teabagging Defined -- Transitive Verb

THE ABSURD TIMES
I have been patiently hoping that the media would stop making such a big deal of the "protest" on Tax Day orchestrated by the remnants of the Republican party and Fox News. I relied on my remote so I would not be subjected to further images of that absurd old lady with a hat full of teabags or the group of morons demonstrating against the new tax code (which works in their favor). It is quite clear that the protests have more to do with the fact that we have an African American President than any political idea. How many of the protestors even knew what the Boston tea Party was? And of those who had a faint glimmer of memory from elementary school, how many realized that they did not have teabags in those days.
At any rate, I finally took the advice of another Ph.D. and looked the word up in the "Urban Drictionary" online. The following is a definition of "Teabagging":
1. teabagging 2462 up, 343 down love ithate it
To have a man insert his scrotum into another person's mouth in the fashion of a teabag into a mug with an up/down (in/out) motion.
Man: Let's teabag!
Your Daughter: Okay!
by anonymous Nov 6, 2002 share this
2. teabagging 966 up, 256 down love ithate it
v. To lower one's scrotum into another's mouth.
Person 1: I want to try teabagging.
Person 2: You mean, you want ME to try teabagging...
by The Grammar Nazi Dec 19, 2001 share this
3. teabagging 6149 up, 947 down love ithate it
the insertion of one man's sack into another person's mouth. Used a practical joke or prank, when performed on someone who is asleep, or as a sexual act.
At the frat house last night, when Tim was wasted an down on the floor, he got teabagged by, like, ten guys!

Me and Jen were teabagging last night when her mom walked in. Awkward.
This part of the demonstration was not carried by the networks.

Monday, April 13, 2009

Easter, Miracles, and Pirates


THE ABSURD TIMES

Easter has just come and gone. Easter is a religious holiday celebrating Jesus' rising from the dead. If he sees his shadow, there are 6 more centuries of colonialism to come.

The release of the Captain of a cargoe ship was seen as an Easter miracle. This show how supersititious people really are. It is as clear as daylight that it was the hanging of yellow ribbons that saved the captain. this is based on a logical proposition called, in Latin, POST HOC, ERGO PROMPTER HOC. First the yellow ribbons, then the release of the captain.

Clear as can be.

It is confusing why the crewmembers of the ship had to be debriefed by the FBI, however. No one explained how the removal of their underwear helped one iota in this situation other than to satisfy the perverted inclinations of the agents.

Watching carefully on Fox News, we were told that National Mariners' Day is coming up in May. This is important information we ignore at our peril.

Often we were told that the ship had been surrounded by United States' warships to "send a message." Now this is an interesting concept. We also piled tons of Warship material in the straits of Hormuz to "send a message" to Iran a couple of years ago. The projected missles to be aimed at Russia from Poland is supposed to "send a message" to either Russia or Iran (it has never been clear which). Tell me, if we are having such budget problems, why don't we use e-mail to send our messages? It's cheaper by far and less likely to be misunderstood.
I didn't mean to stray: We were also told that the Captain voluntered to be a hostage because he was like a good shepherd (in keeping with the Easter spirit, I suppose).

National security also was mentioned, and that leads to the following issue:
I am still wondering why no one has brought up Dick Cheney's assertion to John King on CNN that the Oklahoma City bombing was done by Al-Quada. I guess Timothy McVeigh was secretly a Moslem?

Oh well, now over 200 mariners are safe and sound due, don't forget, to the hanging of yellow ribbons.

Finally, will someone tell the FBI to return the mariners' underwear?

Unfortunately, since the "rescue," a congressman's plane was mortared, about 4 other ships captured, and the crew is still waiting unification with its captain, currently considered a "hero," right up there with Achilles and Hector.

Meanwhile, Blagojevitch appeared in court and tricked the media so they couldn't get photos of him. This is further proof of how corrupt he is, but he said "not-guilty," and threatened that now the "truth will come out." Fitzgerald had better be careful -- there may be a few Republican involved.


Israel Again

THE ABSURD TIMES



Thanks to Norm Finklestein for posting the following:


EXCELLENT ANALYSIS

January 23, 2009

Israel’s Lies

01.29.2009 | The London Review of Books
By Henry Siegman

Western governments and most of the Western media have accepted a number of Israeli claims justifying the military assault on Gaza: that Hamas consistently violated the six-month truce that Israel observed and then refused to extend it; that Israel therefore had no choice but to destroy Hamas’s capacity to launch missiles into Israeli towns; that Hamas is a terrorist organisation, part of a global jihadi network; and that Israel has acted not only in its own defence but on behalf of an international struggle by Western democracies against this network.

I am not aware of a single major American newspaper, radio station or TV channel whose coverage of the assault on Gaza questions this version of events. Criticism of Israel’s actions, if any (and there has been none from the Bush administration), has focused instead on whether the IDF’s carnage is proportional to the threat it sought to counter, and whether it is taking adequate measures to prevent civilian casualties.

Middle East peacemaking has been smothered in deceptive euphemisms, so let me state bluntly that each of these claims is a lie. Israel, not Hamas, violated the truce: Hamas undertook to stop firing rockets into Israel; in return, Israel was to ease its throttlehold on Gaza. In fact, during the truce, it tightened it further. This was confirmed not only by every neutral international observer and NGO on the scene but by Brigadier General (Res.) Shmuel Zakai, a former commander of the IDF’s Gaza Division. In an interview in Ha’aretz on 22 December, he accused Israel’s government of having made a ‘central error’ during the tahdiyeh, the six-month period of relative truce, by failing ‘to take advantage of the calm to improve, rather than markedly worsen, the economic plight of the Palestinians of the Strip . . . When you create a tahdiyeh, and the economic pressure on the Strip continues,’ General Zakai said, ‘it is obvious that Hamas will try to reach an improved tahdiyeh, and that their way to achieve this is resumed Qassam fire . . . You cannot just land blows, leave the Palestinians in Gaza in the economic distress they’re in, and expect that Hamas will just sit around and do nothing.’

The truce, which began in June last year and was due for renewal in December, required both parties to refrain from violent action against the other. Hamas had to cease its rocket assaults and prevent the firing of rockets by other groups such as Islamic Jihad (even Israel’s intelligence agencies acknowledged this had been implemented with surprising effectiveness), and Israel had to put a stop to its targeted assassinations and military incursions. This understanding was seriously violated on 4 November, when the IDF entered Gaza and killed six members of Hamas. Hamas responded by launching Qassam rockets and Grad missiles. Even so, it offered to extend the truce, but only on condition that Israel ended its blockade. Israel refused. It could have met its obligation to protect its citizens by agreeing to ease the blockade, but it didn’t even try. It cannot be said that Israel launched its assault to protect its citizens from rockets. It did so to protect its right to continue the strangulation of Gaza’s population.

Everyone seems to have forgotten that Hamas declared an end to suicide bombings and rocket fire when it decided to join the Palestinian political process, and largely stuck to it for more than a year. Bush publicly welcomed that decision, citing it as an example of the success of his campaign for democracy in the Middle East. (He had no other success to point to.) When Hamas unexpectedly won the election, Israel and the US immediately sought to delegitimise the result and embraced Mahmoud Abbas, the head of Fatah, who until then had been dismissed by Israel’s leaders as a ‘plucked chicken’. They armed and trained his security forces to overthrow Hamas; and when Hamas – brutally, to be sure – pre-empted this violent attempt to reverse the result of the first honest democratic election in the modern Middle East, Israel and the Bush administration imposed the blockade.

Israel seeks to counter these indisputable facts by maintaining that in withdrawing Israeli settlements from Gaza in 2005, Ariel Sharon gave Hamas the chance to set out on the path to statehood, a chance it refused to take; instead, it transformed Gaza into a launching-pad for firing missiles at Israel’s civilian population. The charge is a lie twice over. First, for all its failings, Hamas brought to Gaza a level of law and order unknown in recent years, and did so without the large sums of money that donors showered on the Fatah-led Palestinian Authority. It eliminated the violent gangs and warlords who terrorised Gaza under Fatah’s rule. Non-observant Muslims, Christians and other minorities have more religious freedom under Hamas rule than they would have in Saudi Arabia, for example, or under many other Arab regimes.

The greater lie is that Sharon’s withdrawal from Gaza was intended as a prelude to further withdrawals and a peace agreement. This is how Sharon’s senior adviser Dov Weisglass, who was also his chief negotiator with the Americans, described the withdrawal from Gaza, in an interview with Ha’aretz in August 2004:

What I effectively agreed to with the Americans was that part of the settlements [i.e. the major settlement blocks on the West Bank] would not be dealt with at all, and the rest will not be dealt with until the Palestinians turn into Finns . . . The significance [of the agreement with the US] is the freezing of the political process. And when you freeze that process, you prevent the establishment of a Palestinian state and you prevent a discussion about the refugees, the borders and Jerusalem. Effectively, this whole package that is called the Palestinian state, with all that it entails, has been removed from our agenda indefinitely. And all this with [President Bush’s] authority and permission . . . and the ratification of both houses of Congress.

Do the Israelis and Americans think that Palestinians don’t read the Israeli papers, or that when they saw what was happening on the West Bank they couldn’t figure out for themselves what Sharon was up to?

Israel’s government would like the world to believe that Hamas launched its Qassam rockets because that is what terrorists do and Hamas is a generic terrorist group. In fact, Hamas is no more a ‘terror organisation’ (Israel’s preferred term) than the Zionist movement was during its struggle for a Jewish homeland. In the late 1930s and 1940s, parties within the Zionist movement resorted to terrorist activities for strategic reasons. According to Benny Morris, it was the Irgun that first targeted civilians. He writes in Righteous Victims that an upsurge of Arab terrorism in 1937 ‘triggered a wave of Irgun bombings against Arab crowds and buses, introducing a new dimension to the conflict’. He also documents atrocities committed during the 1948-49 war by the IDF, admitting in a 2004 interview, published in Ha’aretz, that material released by Israel’s Ministry of Defence showed that ‘there were far more Israeli acts of massacre than I had previously thought . . . In the months of April-May 1948, units of the Haganah were given operational orders that stated explicitly that they were to uproot the villagers, expel them, and destroy the villages themselves.’ In a number of Palestinian villages and towns the IDF carried out organised executions of civilians. Asked by Ha’aretz whether he condemned the ethnic cleansing, Morris replied that he did not:

A Jewish state would not have come into being without the uprooting of 700,000 Palestinians. Therefore it was necessary to uproot them. There was no choice but to expel that population. It was necessary to cleanse the hinterland and cleanse the border areas and cleanse the main roads. It was necessary to cleanse the villages from which our convoys and our settlements were fired on.

In other words, when Jews target and kill innocent civilians to advance their national struggle, they are patriots. When their adversaries do so, they are terrorists.

It is too easy to describe Hamas simply as a ‘terror organisation’. It is a religious nationalist movement that resorts to terrorism, as the Zionist movement did during its struggle for statehood, in the mistaken belief that it is the only way to end an oppressive occupation and bring about a Palestinian state. While Hamas’s ideology formally calls for that state to be established on the ruins of the state of Israel, this doesn’t determine Hamas’s actual policies today any more than the same declaration in the PLO charter determined Fatah’s actions.

These are not the conclusions of an apologist for Hamas but the opinions of the former head of Mossad and Sharon’s national security adviser, Ephraim Halevy. The Hamas leadership has undergone a change ‘right under our very noses’, Halevy wrote recently in Yedioth Ahronoth, by recognising that ‘its ideological goal is not attainable and will not be in the foreseeable future.’ It is now ready and willing to see the establishment of a Palestinian state within the temporary borders of 1967. Halevy noted that while Hamas has not said how ‘temporary’ those borders would be, ‘they know that the moment a Palestinian state is established with their co-operation, they will be obligated to change the rules of the game: they will have to adopt a path that could lead them far from their original ideological goals.’ In an earlier article, Halevy also pointed out the absurdity of linking Hamas to al-Qaida.

In the eyes of al-Qaida, the members of Hamas are perceived as heretics due to their stated desire to participate, even indirectly, in processes of any understandings or agreements with Israel. [The Hamas political bureau chief, Khaled] Mashal’s declaration diametrically contradicts al-Qaida’s approach, and provides Israel with an opportunity, perhaps a historic one, to leverage it for the better.

Why then are Israel’s leaders so determined to destroy Hamas? Because they believe that its leadership, unlike that of Fatah, cannot be intimidated into accepting a peace accord that establishes a Palestinian ‘state’ made up of territorially disconnected entities over which Israel would be able to retain permanent control. Control of the West Bank has been the unwavering objective of Israel’s military, intelligence and political elites since the end of the Six-Day War.[*] They believe that Hamas would not permit such a cantonisation of Palestinian territory, no matter how long the occupation continues. They may be wrong about Abbas and his superannuated cohorts, but they are entirely right about Hamas.

Middle East observers wonder whether Israel’s assault on Hamas will succeed in destroying the organisation or expelling it from Gaza. This is an irrelevant question. If Israel plans to keep control over any future Palestinian entity, it will never find a Palestinian partner, and even if it succeeds in dismantling Hamas, the movement will in time be replaced by a far more radical Palestinian opposition.

If Barack Obama picks a seasoned Middle East envoy who clings to the idea that outsiders should not present their own proposals for a just and sustainable peace agreement, much less press the parties to accept it, but instead leave them to work out their differences, he will assure a future Palestinian resistance far more extreme than Hamas – one likely to be allied with al-Qaida. For the US, Europe and most of the rest of the world, this would be the worst possible outcome. Perhaps some Israelis, including the settler leadership, believe it would serve their purposes, since it would provide the government with a compelling pretext to hold on to all of Palestine. But this is a delusion that would bring about the end of Israel as a Jewish and democratic state.

Anthony Cordesman, one of the most reliable military analysts of the Middle East, and a friend of Israel, argued in a 9 January report for the Center for Strategic and International Studies that the tactical advantages of continuing the operation in Gaza were outweighed by the strategic cost – and were probably no greater than any gains Israel may have made early in the war in selective strikes on key Hamas facilities. ‘Has Israel somehow blundered into a steadily escalating war without a clear strategic goal, or at least one it can credibly achieve?’ he asks. ‘Will Israel end in empowering an enemy in political terms that it defeated in tactical terms? Will Israel’s actions seriously damage the US position in the region, any hope of peace, as well as moderate Arab regimes and voices in the process? To be blunt, the answer so far seems to be yes.’ Cordesman concludes that ‘any leader can take a tough stand and claim that tactical gains are a meaningful victory. If this is all that Olmert, Livni and Barak have for an answer, then they have disgraced themselves and damaged their country and their friends.’

Tuesday, April 07, 2009

International Edition -- Explaining America

THE ABSURD TIMES
The Absurd Times has readers in Israel, Canada, the Netherlands, India, Australia, France, Indonesia, New Zealand, Portugal, Sweden, Slovakia, Turkey, the UK, Jordan, Italy, Switzerland, Finland, Belgium, Columbia, and South Africa. Other extensions, unidentified, are gov, coop, arpa, int, edu, and a large number of visits from "Unknown." I even have the flag images to illustrate it.
Since most of these readers have acquired English as a second or third language, their command of the syntax, grammar, and vocabulary is much stronger than that of the average American. As a result, a good deal of what occurs in this country seems very strange and, at best, puzzling. Other aspects of our behavior and especially the behavior of our leaders appear to them as quite preposterous. For this reason, I am undertaking to explain our country and its politics to people who are not fluent in American culture and colloquialisms. For the sake of convenience, I use the term "American" here to refer to citizens of the United States and do not include Canadians, Native Americans, or those who live in the southern Americas.
One of the most common questions has to do with why the American electorate, since 1976 at least, has insisted on electing either cowboys or people with non-standard, extremely southern sounding, accents or, preferably, both.
To understand this, it is important to look at the cinema (what Americans call "movies" or "the theater") since World War II when the United States became acknowledged as a world power and leader. Many Americans grew up watching westerns where there is a sharply drawn distinction between good and evil. Moreover, lest there be any confusion, the actors representing the "Good" wore white cowboy hats and those wearing black hats represented the forces of evil. Since the United States represents the Good, naturally, a cowboy would be an excellent President. Ronald Reagan had a long career starring the "Death Valley Days," a western television series and, hence, was an ideal candidate for President. Many of his historical allusions, in fact, were to events that never really happened but which were scenes from movies. George Bush, the latter, even walked bowlegged. The southern accent was attractive because it was associated here with "conservative" values. There can be no doubt that the southern states, for the most part, are racist and reactionary and, in fact, once even tried to establish their own country here in order to preserve slavery. Sarah Palin was taken seriously because she often flew in helicopters shooting wildlife, much as did legends of the "old west" such as one Wild Bill Hickock.
Additionally, since the majority of Americans no longer wear hats, they need some way to spot Evil. They were obliged with the image of someone with slightly darker skin wearing a beard.
However, so long as we are referring to movies, the best western to review in order to ascertain the American character is "High Noon" with the title song sung by another cowboy, Tex Ritter, and starring Gary Cooper. It clearly indicates the basic cowardice and instinct for self-interest as more important than any such issues as good and evil. This explains the difference between the speeches of recent American Presidents and their actions. Wars against countries such as Granada are much preferable to those against comparable forces. You will notice that even today the United States is issuing grim warnings about the weaponry of North Korea (which is about as advanced as a Nash Rambler) and we take what comfort we can in our own tens of thousands of nuclear weapons. (Better safe than sorry.)
A key source of confusion to those who speak formal English is the "table". I must admit that I have never seen this table, and that only a select few have ever seen it. It's existence must be taken on faith, and that is one reason for Americans proclaiming their religious ardor. So, when the Democrats finally gained a majority in 2006, the Speaker of the House of Representatives announced that "Impeachment is not on the table." I doubt whether prosecution of the previous administrations for its war crimes is on the table either. This table serves a wide variety of purposes. For example, if some action threatens to benefit anyone other than the top 5% of the population, it is "tabled". Then, someone comes along and brushes it off the table and it is never seen again.
A bit of history as to the origins of so-called "natural-born" citizens may help in understanding the thinking of Americans. Many of our first settlers, ignoring the Vikings, were religious fanatics and zealots and British Royalty was quite glad to be rid of them. Another large portion of early settlers were criminals and, again, quite glad to be rid of them. These two groups eventually interbred to produce self-righteous thieves, murderers, and rapists. All three groups comprised the original populations, then.
Later on, a group of other immigrants came, most of them in slave-ships, and their descendants are now called African Americans. More recently, the French gave us the Statue of Liberty with, in part, the following inscription:
"Keep, ancient lands, your storied pomp!" cries she
With silent lips. "Give me your tired, your poor,
Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free,
The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.
Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me,
I lift my lamp beside the golden door!"
As a Brit once stated, "Well, people DID!" I believe they were comprised to a great deal of the "wretched refuse".
However, all of the factors mentioned above do not fully explain Americans. They actually possess a great deal of common sense and some are quite intelligent. For example, about 80% of them do want what should be properly called "Socialized Medicine," but consistently vote against anyone who even uses the phrase except in derision. There are constant complaints about the salaries of unionized workers as compared to those in other countries in the so-called "developed world," but the disparity is largely a result of Socialized Medicine in those countries. Still, moneyed interests lobby against such competitive assets. The United States leads in executions of the death penalty, although it is quite obvious that is not a deterrent. One need only look to Renaissance England where being a pickpocket ("cutpurse") was a capital offense. Where were most of the cutpurses apprehended? At the public executions of other cutpurses. Nothing more than vengeance can explain the popularity of the death penalty, at least that is the only positive explanation of it. The fact that it conflicts with the "Vengeance is mine, saith the Lord," is irrelevant. They have religious leaders who talk to God who told them it was ok in this case. Attempts to collaborate these conversations have heretofore proven unsuccessful.
No, the real explanation is to be found in ignorance. Where Americans are knowledgeable, in sports, for example, they show great memories, intelligence, and analytic skills. However, in subjects such as history, social science, and languages, they are retarded, even with public education. It has been generously estimated that an American High School Graduate, on average, is about two academic years behind European counterparts. This is largely a result of the PTA which insists that certain facts be suppressed, such as those relation to contraception, slavery, imperialism, and so forth. Those who do find the educational system lacking and rebel as carefully weeded out of the system so that only the obedient and addle-minded are allowed to proceed.
How then, does one explain the knowledge and high intelligence of some of the graduates? The answer is obvious: those with high intelligence and perception who do manage to continue in education are passive-aggressive rather than anti-social or direct. The rest are failed, held back, and eventually drop out. Only the mediocre, the naive, or passive-aggressive manage to obtain an education.
There is one fact that merits further explaination -- how and why did they elect Barack Hussein Obama, an African American with an IQ at least two standard deviations above the mean and highly educated in Constitutional Law and committed to helping the lower classes? This at first seems a very glaring anomolie. However, one must take two facts into consideration. First, George Bush was so horrible that even an average American wanted him and his political party gone and rid of, even more than British Royality wanted to be rid of religious fanatics. Second, he states himself that he found that white people are not as much afraid of black people if only the black people smile alot. He found that out when he was sixteen years old. That is why he still smiles too much.
These few words may not be enough to completely explain America to you, but they are at least a good starting point for further research.