Showing posts with label Satire. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Satire. Show all posts

Thursday, May 23, 2019

The About and Abouter -- Paul Duncan



THE ABSURD TIMES




Illustration: Latuff on Palestine.  (Unrelated to anything below).



HELLO AGAIN
BY
THE EDITORS

First a note.  We struggled with a title for some time and considered the following, each separated by a semi-colon:  SATIRE; YOU CAN'T CURE STUPID; IDIOTS TODAY; ABORTION AND GOD (A DIALOGUE); WHY DO WE BOTHER?

Finally, we decided was giving credit to the writer featured here.  His publication has been in effect for three years, and in that time his following of readers, let alone the number of actual readers, has grown to over 20,000.  This is astounding growth, especially since he accomplished this feat without pornography or nudity.  He has used only satire and perception, along with a coherent writing style.

It has been awhile since we have said anything recently.  (Redundant?) In fact, we were surprised that we continued after a brief while after announcing that since Mr. Trump became the holder of his office, the absurdity of things would become apparent and there would be no need for us to point it out.  Well, time has proven us wrong in that and so we resumed.

We have followed with interest the work of Paul Duncan whose column is reprinted below.  It is a brilliant piece of satire that, unfortunately, has received very mixed reaction.  Some of the reaction reminds us of what happened with Fox News several years ago.  A satirical piece of some sort was published in The Onion, a well known such publication.  The issue has long been forgotten, but what is relevant is that FOX republished something that was written in jest but took it as "fact".  Someone there realized the mistake and simply told the reporters not to refer to it anymore, but it proved the point:  Satire is a great weapon, but often misunderstood.

To put it another way, to use a modern term: you can't cure stupid. 

Well, stupid is what happened to this issue of abortion as commented on below.  Reaction was very mixed and far too many readers did not understand satire.

This problem goes back a long way.  We will stick with fairly modern history and forget about the Ancient Greek comedy.  We can skip ahead to the 18th century and the British AGE OF SATIRE. 

Jonathan Swift, known today for Gulliver's Travels, once wrote an essay called "A Modest Proposal".  He was protesting the treatment of Ireland by the English.  Ireland was starving as a result of the English absentee landlords, imperial policies, starvation, and famine.  Swift had proposed several serious proposals to rectify the situation, but greed defeated them all.  He finally wrote the essay in order to bring some attention to the situation.

His proposal said, essentially, that the Irish could sell their babies as food for the rich and then went on to explain how the roasting and cooking could be done.  In the same essay, he said words to the effect that all the other measures he had suggested were not as important as this vital resource the Irish had available.  Well, the reaction was violent and ill-informed.   He did, at least, call attention to the problems that British occupation of Ireland caused.  Two centuries later, something was finally done.

Well, today we have the problem of individual rights: specifically, the right of a woman to have control over her own body.  This is not a religious issue, nor is it a scientific one.  The issue of when life begins is a false one as even sperm is alive for a short time, and every piece of sperm is a potential human life.  It is possible to therefore consider the practice of masturbation as killing life, and even impregnating a female results in the death of many bits of sperm, only one of which finally fertilizes a woman's egg and then may or may not result in a fetus,

One sign or slogan of the woman's march became our favorite: DEREGULATE MY UTERUS.  Capitalism is intent on deregulating anything that will affect profits, to hell with the populace. 

This is the first time we have even touched on the issue of abortion here and we hope it is the last.  If there is anything a human being has a right to deal with, it is one's own life.  All else is folly.

However, YOU CAN'T CURE STUPID.


Air Canada Announces New Direct Route From Alabama To Toronto-Area Women's Clinics

BY PAUL DUNCAN ON MAY 19, 2019  11 COMMENTS )
The new route has already been dubbed the Right to Flight.
In a move as unexpected as it is disturbingly necessary, Canada's flagship carrier today announced that it would begin operating humanitarian flights between man-state Alabama, and Toronto's Pearson International Airport. 
The flights will be free for any woman who presents herself at an Air Canada ticketing counter, says she is going to Canada to visit her "sister," and then raises her eyebrows, lowers her chin, and looks meaningfully at the agent.
"As part of our ongoing initiative to use the modern miracle of flight to avoid returning to the middle ages, Air Canada is proud to announce a new, twice-daily, direct flight from Birmingham, Alabama, to Toronto, Ontario," a spokesperson for the Canadian airline announced today.
She went on to add that a complimentary shuttle to women's health clinics would also be provided – one that would be piloted by a rotating team of local women's rights leaders, and would play a soothing selection of music for oppressed females, such as Lesley Gore's 'You Don't Own Me,' and Rage Against The Machine's 'Bombtrack.'
"Which goes, and I quote: 'Cause I'm inclined to stoop down, hand out some beat-downs; could run a train on punk fools, that think they run the game. But I learned to burn that bridge, and delete, those who compete at a level that's obsolete.'"
The announcement was greeted with outrage amongst hardline anti-abortion campaigners, and other people with extremely selective forms of compassion that focus exclusively on the rights of people seeds, but not those of the actual living trees.   
"If the Canadians – with their generally inclusive nation, and leader who uses intelligible words to express complete thoughts – think they can just fly in here on their airplanes and offer our women easy access to not living lives of quiet desperation, well they have got another thing coming. And that thing is Alabama," said a man born in Montgomery in 1956, but whose thinking remains steeped in Canaan, circa 1600 BCE.  
"Figuratively speaking, obviously. As I have no idea where Canada actually is."
Air Canada officials say they don't mean to offend anyone with their new flight option, "But we aren't opposed to it either."
While many other states in the U.S. still offer sane, reasonable options for women looking to have some control over their own bodies and lives, the Canadian airline said they wanted to make sure that alternatives remained available no matter which way the political winds should turn in the coming years. 
"In addition to this new service to Alabama we're looking into routes to and from Missouri and Georgia; and are prepared to go into any other state that chooses to file their political flight path under 'Backasswards.' While Roe v. Wade may well be under threat for our friends in America, we can assure you that modern air travel v. angry men with pitchforks an torches on horses, is a battle we will win every time."


For more Canadian satire, follow  The Out And Abouter on Facebook, or @OutAndAbouter on Twitter.

Wednesday, November 05, 2014

The Good of This Election


The Good of This Election



First of all, I apologize to those of you who got the strange post from my on "How to Vote".  It's the last time I try to post online, live, while using a portable laptop in a moving vehicle.  Also, the site only sends out the first version, not the corrected one, so I simply deleted that one sentence thing.

So, welcome to the kinder, gentler, Absurd Times.  It will be wry, however.  I just like that word wry.  Those of you who are in Moldovia or Ukraine and use Google Translate to read this, good luck.  (However, in Russian it is перекошенный. which comes out as "wry."  Very wry outcome, in my opinion.

OK.  So, what do we get from this last election?

Instead of trying to cover the folly in an article, I took to Twitter (Absurd Times @honestcharlie) because it really was appropriate for one liners, not analysis.

Example: Don't vote for anyone who lists castrating hogs as her qualification for the Senate.

            Vote for anyone who is accused of being "Corrupt" -- at least they have played the game before.

This election will go a long way towards furthering the careers of political satirists.  Add a Republican Presidents, and things will be even funnier.  Remember how funny the McCain/Palin combination was?  It got so most people visualized Tina Fey when the name "Sarah Palin" was mentioned.

To give you an example, today a non-profession stated that Nick Wallendsa (whoever it was who did that stunt in Chicago at the Marina Towers recently) announced that he would walk a tightrope across Ted Cruz's open mouth.  So, things are looking up already.

I did not see or hear Obama's press conference or speech earlier, but I was outside dining and the person opposite me looked up and saw him on the TV with a map of Syria and Iraq.  I was asked what he was saying.  Well, I had no idea and did not look back, but did mention that Henry IV advised his son, soon to be Henry V, to keep people busy with wars against a foreign enemy in the people you rule start to complain.  Give them a common, foreign, enemy.  My guess is that was the point, but I'm not sure.

Every single so-called "Left-Wing" ballot initiative passed almost everywhere: legalizing pot, supporting a woman's right to choose, overwhelming support for a higher minimum wage, expanded single payer insurance (as in government), legalizing gay marriage (why should they be exempt?), and so on.  The Democrats might think about such things the next time around.

Of course, then things wouldn't be so funny.  Nixon gave everyone lots of laughs.  Reagan brought out the best in Bedtime for Bonzo  and did Clint Eastwood impressions for us.  In fact, he re-enacted lots of movies for us.  Even when he had to withdraw the marines from Lebanon, he snapped into action by invading Grenada.  Why?  Well, there were Cuban construction workers there -- those guys can be tough, you know.

The Bushes were a goldmine.  They were the Arbustos (means shrub in Spanish) of the day.  I mean, these days Obama has to supply the punch lines by himself.  When asked why Donald Trump was so vicious about him, Obama said "It all goes back to when we played soccer together in school growing up in Kenya."  Who could top him?

No, we need a Republican president. 

Well, this has already been too long, considering that about a third or more of our readers are overseas, so we will be back to the real world with the next issue.

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Wednesday, July 02, 2014

Ukraine, Califate, Satire



THE ABSURD TIMES






Yes, as Carlos points out, Ukraine was sold to the lowest bidder and they don't know it yet.  Now they have the same opportunities as all the other E
U Countries, almost, and at least austerity, which will sound good to them.  They deserve it.  They will be led down the path by the man they call "The Candy Man."





Another by the Great Carlos Latuff.  Essentially, he says "Keep it up, but leave my oil alone."  One of the great mysteries of recent times has been how our iol got under their land.

Now, we have not been publishing for awhile.  The reason is simple -- we no longer give a shit.  However, we did look into the Caliphate issue for you as the networks haven't covered it as the soccer matches have been going on.  Essentially, Obama has done so much to encourage the terrorists in Syria, funded by the rich gulf states, that they have branched out as ISIS, then ISIL, and now the Emirate.   All Moslems are to sear allegiance to their leader, whose name is hard to spell.

Anyway, the Emirate is supposed to grow.   First to include all the known Islamic world, then all the world.  I wasn't so sure about this, so I figured that if the Emirate will cover the world,  it will eventually get to Chicago.  So I called an old friend in Chicago who gave me the number of another Chicagoan a third generation Moslem, what he though about it.  Here is a transcript of that interview"

Q. Hello?
A. Yeah, waddya want?  Whosdis?
Q. This is the Absurd Times, and we got your number from a friend [identified here] who though you might give us your idea of the Emerite.
A. Yeah? Waddy wanna know?
Q/ Well, the first things is are you in favor or against?
A. Ah, dats right.  It's ok, so long as I get ta be da big cheese, da Boss.  So yeah, like da idea.
Q. But someone has also already said he is the leader.
A. Nah, no way.  I'm older dan him, sos hes gotta respek his elders, see?
Q. I see.  So, I suppose you'd have your headquarters in the Willis Building, or the Old Sears Towers?
A. Nope.
Q. Oh.
A. Iz dat all?
Q. No, can I print your name here for our readers?
A. Yeah, its Laith al Kouri Kakka nur Kallifi bin Farook al Numr abu Baghdadi Tiki.
Q. Er, could you say that once more?
A. He no, ya dumb fuck, waddya tink I'm here fer?  I'm dad Calif.
Q. Very well, so where will you have your headquarters.
A. I'm tinkin dat Tel Aviv.
Q. But that's in Israel.
A. Naw -- Part a da Caliphate.
Q. I mean they are Jewish there.
A. Nah -- deys all gatta become Moslem.
Q. What if they dont want to.
A. Well make em.
Q. You're talking about another Holocaust?
A. Hall's a wat?
Q. I mean, they will bring up the Holocaust.
A. Oh, I against dat.  Don't like da Holocaust.

Well, there you have it.  The next Calif is totally against the Holocaust.

Obama is asking to $500 million to send to Assad's enemies. 

The Supreme Court has decided that corporations have religious rights.  Of course, it has always been against the corporate religion to pay taxes.

And you wonder why we haven't bothered lately?









MONDAY, JUNE 30, 2014

Egyptian Comedian Bassem Youssef Says His Satire Has Inspired Youth to Reject Military Propaganda

In a development many are linking to the Egyptian regime’s crackdown on dissent, Egypt’s most popular satirist announced this month that he was taking his program off the air. Bassem Youssef’s broadcast had been compared to Jon Stewart’s "The Daily Show" for its comedic take on politics in Egypt and the Middle East. The show was incredibly popular — reaching as many as 30 million views per episode. Youssef said he was ending his program rather than face censorship and threats on his life. Yousef was vague on the pressure he has faced, but suggested the military regime has made it impossible for him to continue. Speaking at the Deutsche Welle Global Media Forum, Youssef said his decision to suspend the show could be seen as a new beginning. "We have inspired a whole generation to go out there and express themselves in their own way," Youssef says. "Satire and comedy might be one of the few antidotes against fear. It liberates your mind. It sets your judgment free. That is why it is a threat."

TRANSCRIPT

This is a rush transcript. Copy may not be in its final form.
AMY GOODMAN: In a development many are linking to the Egyptian regime’s crackdown on dissent, Egypt’s most popular satirist announced earlier this month he’s taking his program off the air, just days after General Abdel Fattah el-Sisi was elected president. Bassem Youssef’s broadcast has been compared to Jon Stewart’sThe Daily Show for its comedic take on politics in Egypt and the Middle East. The show was incredibly popular, reaching as many as 30 million views per episode. Bassem Youssef said he was ending his program rather than face censorship and threats on his life. Youssef was vague on the pressure he has faced but suggested that the military regime has made it impossible for him to continue. Earlier today, Bassem Youssef, who is a heart surgeon by training, spoke here at the Deutsche Welle Global Media Forum.
BASSEM YOUSSEF: Fear sells. Fear works. Fear makes you get away with anything. And when people are afraid, they will not accept logic, let alone satire. Fear can drive the masses. Fear can turn them into ruthless organisms devoid of human mercy and intellectual logic. Fear can drive humans to give up their best-ever given trait: humanity. Under fear, they accept taking away the right to object, to oppose, and even applaud taking away other people’s rights. Under fear, fascism becomes coveted, and "human rights" becomes an indecent word.
Our job was to expose those irrational fears, to dissect through the unfair use of such human basic instinct in order to give up basic human rights and needs. This might sound strange, but again, let me remind you that fear sells, fear delivers. Fear is much, much more stronger. Fear might be the greatest mover of masses ever. You have experienced this during your history. The world has experienced Nazism, fascism, McCarthyism. All were movements that used fears and phobia and empty, vicious rhetoric in order to control the masses.
Sixty years later, those techniques are still valid. We saw how the most advanced democratic countries used fear to drag the whole world into war, like the Bush years in America. Their main weapon was not state-of-the-art aircraft carriers or stealth fighters, but good old national scare fear. Fear is the favorite weapon of all—democratic countries, autocratic countries, religious states and terrorist groups. It’s the favorite brand of all. Fear sells. Fear works. Fear is a winner.
Satire and comedy might be one of the very few antidotes against fear. It liberates your minds. It sets your judgment free. And that is why it is a threat. And that is why people who use satire will be alienated, marginalized or even scared off. It doesn’t matter if it was a government who thinks that they are closer to God than you or a regime that believes that they are more patriotic than you. You, as a satirist, has no place in the world. It is a world where fascism is celebrated and where fear rules. But satire comes to disrupt such an equation, because when you laugh, you cannot be afraid anymore, because—and thus the system will make sure to eliminate that powerful weapon of laughter, in order for fear to set in.
But maybe there is a small beacon of hope. Maybe change will come from the most unexpected places. The world today is a young world. Youth are connected now more than ever. The Internet and the open skies offers an opportunity that was not there many years ago, when regimes can get away with anything. When we started on the Internet three years ago, we might be the—at that time, the only one in our country who did that with such a unique idea and format, but now the Internet is full of young people coming up every single day to combat fear, intimidation and media deception. We were too big to be allowed to continue, but by the time we were banned, the change has already happened. Stopping the show might be viewed as a sad ending, but we would like to look at it as a new beginning. We have inspired a whole generation to go out there and express themselves in their own way.
The old techniques of the '40s and ’50s won't cut it with those youngsters. The propaganda that worked for their parents’ generation won’t be able to control them anymore. The plethora of fascism that plagues certain regions on the planet right now is only a temporary and transient moment of time that will be soon washed away by the upcoming generation. Fascism now is overwhelming, that you might think that the long-coveted freedom is stillborn. But that is not true. As Bevan once said, "Fascism is not a new order of society. It is the future refusing to be born." But I tell you that the future is already here. It is just warming up. So fear might sell. Fear might work. Fear might win. But it will eventually face its defeat. And the battlefield for that glorious victory will be no other than the hearts and minds of vibrant, inspired young people who will not give in to fear.
AMY GOODMAN: That’s Bassem Youssef, Egypt’s most popular satirist, speaking here at the Deutsche Welle Global Media Forum in Bonn, Germany. The Committee to Protect Journalists awarded Bassem Youssef the International Press Freedom Award in 2013. He received the award from Jon Stewart of The Daily Show, the comedian to whom he’s most frequently compared in Egypt.
And that does it for today’s broadcast. I’ll be speaking tomorrow morning at the Deutsche Welle Media Forum here in Bonn, as well on—later in the week, I’ll be speaking in Visby, Sweden. I’ll be speaking at the Church of Sweden on the island of Gotland. You can check democracynow.org for details.
Happy birthday to Isis Phillips.
Democracy Now! has two job openings. We have a job opening for an administrative director, as well as a Linux systems administrator, and fall internships. Visitdemocracynow.org/jobs for more information.


The original content of this program is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 3.0 United States License. Please attribute legal copies of this work to democracynow.org. Some of the work(s) that this program incorporates, however, may be separately licensed. For further information or additional permissions, contact us.

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Saturday, March 14, 2009

Economics and Satire

THE ABSURD TIMES





Illustration: Swift, from Wikipedia.
I was preparing a series on the economy when an interesting and quite funny exchange developed and it reminded me of my own observation: If you take yourself seriously as a professional, never attack a satirist. Even a mediocre satirist has the advantage as one of his [I use this grammatically as the first person singular and anyone who thinks it makes me a mysoginist has the problem in his brain, not mine, and I am too old now to care if it is politically incorrect] characteristics is that he does not pretend to take himself seriously. I'll start with a famous example.

Jonathin Swift, illustration, once became fed up with a contemporary astrologer named Partridge. The Partridge took himself very seriously and had a number of gullible followers. Here is a short description of him: "Partridge undertook to himself the task of reforming astrology. His program for reform involved eliminating the elements derived for the medieval Arabic tradition in favor of a return to Ptolemy."

Swift finally became too irritated when Partridge attacked the church with which he was affiliated or at least respected. At this point, Swift published a few articles, all talking about the impending death of Partridge and then finally Partidges' obituary.

People crowded around Partridges' house day and night offering condolences, weeping, even as Partridge himself was trying to sleep or was telling them to go home. Finally, in complete anger, Partridge published a short article attacking Swift and laudly proclaiming that he, Partirdge, was still alive.

Swift countered by publishing an article lamenting the passing of the late Partridge and expressing indignation that someone is now pretending to be the late, great, Partridge, spoiling his name and reputation. After that, Partridge was history.

Now for the present: recently a "personality" on CNBC, Jim Cramer, who can be described as a madman giving hypercaffinated stock tips or analysis, had a modest by loyal following. He went on a blithering rant recently attacking Obama for the bailout of the failing banks, ignoring the fact that all of our economic problems result from greed and deregulation, starting from the Reagen Presidency, and going wild buring the last Bush Presidency. At any rate, the rant was so wierd that Jon Stewart featured it and made fun of it.

So far, so good. But Cramer was not content to let it rest at that. He turned around and attacked Stewart, defending himself. Stewart then started to play other clips from Cramer, such as advising that investing in Bear Sterns was a good idea -- a week before it collapsed. All of these clips and such are available on youtube so there is no point in going into more detail. The point is, this Cramer should be washed up -- unless the publicity he got by being humiliated generates curiosity. He then appeared on Stewart's show and Stewart did the best serious interview I've seen since the days of Terkel. It is on comedychannel.com and worth watching. Cramer was glad to leave with his life.

For the most part, politicians tend to make themselves ridiculous. Ari Fleisher recently defended the Bush administration by saying the threat from Saddam Hussein to the United States was real. In a follow-up, Gaffney, another Republican, said that Saddam was responsible for the Oklahoma City bombings! Since he was with serious broadcasters and not satirists, he managed to escape without much ridicule, but these are such obvious straight lines and openings they are hardly worthy of satire. The guy who threw the shoes at Bush was sentenced to three years in prison by Iraqi operatives. No sense of gratitude whatsoever. If he worked for the Bush administration and done that to anybody Spanish Speaking, he would have received a medal of honor as did Paul Bremer who turned Iraq into an enen greater disaster than in was.

And then, even blaming anyone other than God for the 9/11 attacks is absurd. The WTC was constructed to be a taller building that the Sears Tower in Chicago and that's why God destroyed it. Now, some British insurance company bought it and intends to rename it the Willis Tower. Either people will ignore the name change or something horrible is going to happen. You heard it here, folks.

Bernie Madoff (pronounced made off, who would give their money to a guy with a name like that?) stated he was "ashamed." Awwww. I heard one individual complain that he lost Millions to Madoff. Awwww, and what an ASS! If money meant brains, it would not have happened.

We have also learned that there were Bush/Cheney Assassination squads that reported directly to them and that operated overseas. And we thought Nixon's "Plumbers" squad was corrupt?
I'm waiting for prosecution of most of the people in the Bush administration. There is enough evidence, both internal and overseas, to put all of them away for a long time. I wonder if it will happen.

Steele, the Chair of the Republican National Committee gave me much to wonder about. Why pick him? I'm trying to imagine the Republican thought processes (I know, bad idea). "Hip Hop" Republicans? The lines write themselves. I can imagine it went something like this "We gotta appeal to more stupid people. I know, let's get ourselves a black guy -- it worked for the Democrats. And they know how to be republican. Look at Clarance Thomas! Yeah." Just recently he said that abortion should be a woman's choice. Oops! "Lets give him a little more time. If he keeps screwing up, we'll find another black guy, yeah."

Anyway, now I'm going to turn my attention to a coupel Nobel Prize winners in Economics -- you should have the information.