From our favorite cartoonist and social commentator. A bunch of them, all relevant.
Wednesday, June 15, 2016
Wednesday, June 08, 2016
Ali v. Lies
THE ABSURD TIMES
Mohammed Ali v. Lies
By
Jack Hammer
So many times during the last few days I've seen people talking about Ali after he died and shouted "Bullshit …", that the times asked me to comment. I wanted to just say it outright, but this is a written forum. So here it is.
Most of the coverage of Ali has been by sportswriters who are almost all very stupid about everything except sports. When Ali began, sports commentators at best had high-school educations. There were a few notable exceptions back then and a few now, but it is not an area where social consciousness is ripe.
Before Ali's first fight with Liston, someone told me "Liston'll kill him." I made a bet and it was one of the most lucrative bets I ever made.
The guy who said that was a baseball player on the same team as me. However, I was a pitcher and hence smarter.
People had not seen Cassius Clay in Rome at the Olympics. He won first place and was overwhelmingly a better boxer than the rest of the team and competition combined. The Polish opponent had nothing but praise for him. People didn't get the rules either. At least at that time, fighters scored points for hitting the opponent, no mater whether lightly or hard. Clay was fast and a light heavy weight. His speed was unmatched. JFK was President.
When Clay went back to Louisville to eat in a white only restaurant (after all, he had represented the United States) he was refused. Soon after, he threw his gold medal away (not much later and you hear on the media, even today).
When the guy made the bet, he had no idea of what he was talking about. I told him "He won't even see him." The amount increased.
That time I brushed him back first.
At that time, the fight game was run by organized crime, large and small. The fighters got almost nothing. J. Edgar Hoover liked it that way. After all, the Mob knew about his cross-dressing.
Also at that time, Malcolm X was doing the radio broadcasts for the Black Mulsims, or the "Nation of Islam" and he was an amazing speaker over, I think, WEEW radio in Evanston, Illinois. Later, when the "Nation" started to mess with him, Elijah Mohammed took over those broadcasts and it was clear how strange he was. Malcolm had gone to the Pilgrimage in Mecca and changed greatly. Ali did not, but Malcolm had recruited him.
After Clay won the fight against Liston, the Nation or Black Muslims moved in and took control and that was what started the real trouble. The FBI had already been tapping Malcolm's phone and now they tapped Ali's as well. Organized crime lost control of the business and this upset a lot of people and the propaganda started.
All but a very few sports announcers still called him Clay. Other than a few black reporters, only one of not called him "Mohammed Ali," and that was Howard Cosell. People still like to hate Cosell. However, he graduated from law school and hence knew a bit more than the others, perhaps an unfair advantage.
After that, he had several Championship fights, not avoiding anyone as most champions did. He continued until they drafted him. The first time, he could not pass the "IQ" test for the Army. I knew an utter fool who bought beer by the case (quarts) who was nearly mindless and who reported that he had "one of the top three tests" for the marines, meaning he was third. This was when Ali tested even lower, much lower.
As his reputation grew, JFK was assassinated and the war grew as well. People started to avoid the draft, especially people like Dick Cheney. Ali was reclassified. Only Howard Cosell put him on the air as Ali refused induction. Freedom of religion. He also said "Aint no Viet Cong never called me nigger."
Just about everyone was attacking him or, as one reporter put it a day or so ago, "except for black youth and a few people in the counter-culture". Well, I guess I was a part of the counter-culture because I thought he had the right. So did Cosell.
The case went to the Supreme Court, after three and a half years, and he won unanimously, 8-0, and was informed of this by, you guessed it, Howard Cosell, who had also predicted it.
The rest of the story becomes more accurate. Ali later became a Sunni Muslim like Malcolm did, although after Malcolm was assassinated, just as were Martin Luther King and Bobby Kennedy.
There is no time now to refute all the garbage about his "cruelty," other than to remark that trash talk is rampant in sports and always has been. Some say he carried Floyd Patterson and kept yelling what's my name and would not knock him out because he would not call him Ali. However, in a later fight, lang after Ali should have retired, he fought Larry Holmes. Holmes kept telling the referee to stop the fight as Ali was being seriously hurt. The referee did not, but he could have, easily. The same applied to the Patterson incident. The referee could have stopped it if he thought it best.
Right now, there are only two sportscasters whom you can trust to talk about this: Kieth Olbermann and Bob Costas.
Ali was and is known around the world and widely seen as a hero. He had Parkinson's and that is constantly referred to as caused by boxing. Maybe. However, Michael J. Fox was never a prizefighter. At any rate, boxing has not been a major sport for some time now.
So, on Thursday, and the Friday, there will be a funeral and a burial for Ali. Just remember the truth as the "reporters" talk.
Sunday, June 05, 2016
THE ABSURD TIMES
THE ABSURD TIMES
Have you noticed that the corporate media has anointed
Clinton and Hawked Trump?
Illustration by Latuff
We told you some time ago about how foolish it was to depose
Gaddafi. The UN resolution was to
“ensure the safety of citizen’s in Lybia.”
That’s all. That is why Russia
and China went along with it. There was
no mandate for regime change. That is
why Russia and China will not vote with us or believe us again.
Gaddafi provided jobs for thousands of refugees from North
Africa. Without him, ISIS has taken
over half of Libya, especially Benghazi, and above you see another consequence
of the action.
Most important is that we predicted all of this in the
Absurd Times. Supporting Erdogan in
Turkey (who has censored Latuff, officially, not even Israel stooping so low)
has also led to scenes such as above.
Now, there is a great fuss over who can remember Mohammed
Ali the best. Back then, the race was
to vilify home the most.
For all of these reason and more, we are opening the ABSURD
UNIVERSITY. It is not accredited, of
course, and such an idea would be absurd in itself. If you have any credit hours at Trump University or were in any
way associated with it, you are not eligible.
Entrance exams include questions such as the following:
1)
Who was behind the Law Firm of Dewey, Cheatum, and Howe?
2)
[ed. Note] all other questions have been censored.
There will be no more editions of this publication until
somebody says something worthwhile.
Have a nice summer. (You can
find worthwhile coverage of events on You Tube on the YOUNG TURKS show –
reporters once on MSNBC and CURRENT.)
Friday, May 27, 2016
Chickentrump
THE ABSURD TIMES
#CHICKENTRUMP
Twitter selection of trend:
Trump decides he won't debate Bernie Sanders
"It seems inappropriate that I would debate the second place finisher," he said.
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Bone-In #ChickenTrump Foreign Policy
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RT #ChickenTrump is trending... sweet! : #ChickenTrump is trending... sweet! http://twitter.com/WindyDane/status/736324067943407617/photo/1pic.twitter.com/XYm6uT19gi
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@abowersock I dunno about "less integrity than Hillary". I'd say the 2 of them fought that one to a draw. 😂 #ChickenHillary #ChickenTrump
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Twitter users hatch hilarious #ChickenTrump tag: 'Make America Cluck Again!' http://ow.ly/TZoo300FzfG
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Barracks O'Bama Retweeted Zeke Miller
Right after I don't debate Bernie and don't raise $10 million for charities who won't get the money. #ChickenTrump Barracks O'Bama added,
Zeke Miller @ZekeJMiller
Trump repeats: On Tuesday I’m announcing all of the groups that we’ve given almost $6m to.
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.@realDonaldTrump is a coward in chief. #ChickenTrump.
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Brave Sir Donald ran away... #ChickenTrump
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Whatever else you want to call Trump, & there are many options, 1 thing we can ALL agree on, he's #ChickenTrump.
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Being Love @InLWithLBeingL 1h1 hour ago
Trump won't debate Bernie Sanders-Trump is TURNING DOWN 10Million 4 CHARITY! 🔥🔥🔥🔥#ChickenTrump
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FriendofTrees @JamiaStarheart 1h1 hour ago
#ChickenTrump demanded $10 million for debate, even more is offered but he wanted that for himself, not charity. True colors: yellow bellied
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Come on #ChickenTrump, if you can't handle Bernie you have no right to be POTUS. http://thehill.com/blogs/ballot-box/presidential-races/281563-sanders-blasts-trump-what-are-you-afraid-of …
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A Teen 4 Bernie @TeenForBernie 2h2 hours ago
.@realDonaldTrump Give me one good reason why you can't debate? Did you lose your voice or get a vasectomy? #ChickenTrump
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A Teen 4 Bernie @TeenForBernie 2h2 hours ago
Wow. Donald Trump backed out? He's pathetic. I don't know why but I'm disappointed in him. #ChickenTrump
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Xavier Pérez @DOUBTMYPROGRESS 2h2 hours ago Manhattan, NY
I found out why @realDonaldTrump is so afraid of @BernieSanders...
#ColonelSanders #ChickenTrump
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Denise ~ Bernie2016 @LostDiva 2h2 hours ago
Denise ~ Bernie2016 Retweeted
Trump managed to insult everyone except #BernieSanders.
#ChickenTrump is the 1%, people. Don't forget it! https://twitter.com/NizamovRus/status/736304593076903936 …
Denise ~ Bernie2016 added,
This Tweet is unavailable.
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jennifer dillon @funkinatrix 2h2 hours ago Kihei, HI
Donald Trump is very concerned about being "appropriate". 😂 Seems legit. 🐓🐔🐤 #ChickenTrump #BernieTrumpDebate
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Europe For Sanders @Europe4Sanders 2h2 hours ago
What sound does #ChickenTrump make? "Bawk, Bawk, Bawkaaaawk, Bawk, Bawk, Bawk, Bawkaaaawk"
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Denise ~ Bernie2016 @LostDiva 2h2 hours ago
#ChickenTrump is no #BirdieSanders!
#ChickenHillary won’t debate #BernieSanders.
1%er don’t care about our issues.
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Jared Rice @CouncilmanRice 2h2 hours ago
#ChickenTrump backs out of the #BernieTrumpDebate. Too bad. California now has nobody willing to discuss the issues with @BernieSanders.
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Viva Bernie @vivabernie 2h2 hours ago
Haha @realDonaldTrump is scared of two things a real American Eagle n a real debate w @BernieSanders #ChickenTrump
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RiskyLiberal @RiskyLiberal 2h2 hours ago
.@RealDonaldTrump is now #ChickenTrump. Trump opens his mouth, and lies fall out. What an immature, childish fool #DonTheCon is
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Tallman @Tallman7861 2h2 hours ago
#ChickenTrump is afraid of @berniesaners @realdonalddrump Man-child-baby-hands With bad policy #BERNIEtrumpDEBATE
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PA for Bernie @PA4Sanders 2h2 hours ago Pennsylvania, USA
What do @realDonaldTrump and @HillaryClinton have in common? They're both scared of the strongest candidate. #ChickenTrump
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Xavier Pérez @DOUBTMYPROGRESS 2h2 hours ago Manhattan, NY
If you are a supporter of #ChickenTrump aka @realDonaldTrump, you should be ashamed of your candidate backing out!
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#CHICKENTRUMP
Twitter selection of trend:
Trump decides he won't debate Bernie Sanders
"It seems inappropriate that I would debate the second place finisher," he said.
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A girl has no name @Bernieforny2016 8m8 minutes ago
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Truth Mashup Retweeted Truth Mashup
Wonder what #ChickenTrump is doing right now? https://twitter.com/truthmashup/status/736305055326965760 … #TYTLive
Truth Mashup added,
Truth Mashup @truthmashup
#ChickenTrump you say? #FeelTheBern #BernieTrumpDebate #uspoli
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Brendan4Bernie @WirSindAlleFRK 10m10 minutes ago
The besties have one more thing in common
They are too afraid to debate with @BernieSanders
#ChickenTrump
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Renee Hooray @ReneeHooray 10m10 minutes ago
All the intelligent, experienced, patriotic, rational, caring people in this country and we let #ChickenTrump come this far
#ShutTrumpDown
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Jasmin @jcl0611 10m10 minutes ago
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¡Viva Bernie! @BilblyBob 10m10 minutes ago
Why did #ChickenTrump cross the road? To avoid this outcome:
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#ChickenTrump: "I'll build a wall, and I'll hide behind it."
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nance @StarSong777 10m10 minutes ago
#ChickenTrump and pizza , weenies ,fried cluck, pickles olives greasy fries n burgers
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LiberalValuesNetwork @lordxmen2k 11m11 minutes ago
Bone-In #ChickenTrump Foreign Policy
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RT #ChickenTrump is trending... sweet! : #ChickenTrump is trending... sweet! http://twitter.com/WindyDane/status/736324067943407617/photo/1pic.twitter.com/XYm6uT19gi
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💛 #ChickenTrump is trending guys!!! Let's keep it up!!! 👏👏
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Gay Bernie Brit @UKBerner 15m15 minutes ago
Gay Bernie Brit Retweeted PIP Unite
Could #ChickenTrump un-chicken-out? Gay Bernie Brit added,
PIP Unite @PIPUnite
RT @NCForBernie: ABC, CBS, Fox News & TYT Express Interest in Trump-Sanders Debate https://www.yahoo.com/tv/abc-cbs-fox-news-express-interest-trump-sanders-220513707.html … #BernieTrumpDebate #FeelTheBern
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Karma Sandernista @samhsarah 27m27 minutes ago Bayville, NJ
@abowersock I dunno about "less integrity than Hillary". I'd say the 2 of them fought that one to a draw. 😂 #ChickenHillary #ChickenTrump
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Russell barry Retweeted
The Progressive Mind @Libertea2012 29m29 minutes ago
RT #ChickenTrump is trending! Lets see if we can get it to number 1 and maybe @realDonaldTrump responds! :…
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People For Bernie @People4Bernie 39m39 minutes ago
.@realDonaldTrump is another bloated suit claiming to want to give to charity but actually he is just #ChickenTrump
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Sue M and 31 others follow
Raw Story @RawStory 57m57 minutes ago
Twitter users hatch hilarious #ChickenTrump tag: 'Make America Cluck Again!' http://ow.ly/TZoo300FzfG
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almightygod @almightygod 1h1 hour ago
Here's @realDonaldTrump thinking about debating truth-telling @BernieSanders. #ChickenTrump
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Barracks O'Bama @P0TUS 1h1 hour ago
Barracks O'Bama Retweeted Zeke Miller
Right after I don't debate Bernie and don't raise $10 million for charities who won't get the money. #ChickenTrump Barracks O'Bama added,
Zeke Miller @ZekeJMiller
Trump repeats: On Tuesday I’m announcing all of the groups that we’ve given almost $6m to.
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Lights Out and 9 others follow
Millennials 4 Bernie @Bernlennials 1h1 hour ago
.@realDonaldTrump is a coward in chief. #ChickenTrump.
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TheFOO @PolitiBunny 1h1 hour ago
Brave Sir Donald ran away... #ChickenTrump
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mock_you_men_tory @LiteisoN 1h1 hour ago
Whatever else you want to call Trump, & there are many options, 1 thing we can ALL agree on, he's #ChickenTrump.
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The Force of Liberty and 14 others follow
Being Love @InLWithLBeingL 1h1 hour ago
Trump won't debate Bernie Sanders-Trump is TURNING DOWN 10Million 4 CHARITY! 🔥🔥🔥🔥#ChickenTrump
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FriendofTrees @JamiaStarheart 1h1 hour ago
#ChickenTrump demanded $10 million for debate, even more is offered but he wanted that for himself, not charity. True colors: yellow bellied
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Progressive News and 4 others follow
Stoned Robot @stonedRobot9000 2h2 hours ago
Come on #ChickenTrump, if you can't handle Bernie you have no right to be POTUS. http://thehill.com/blogs/ballot-box/presidential-races/281563-sanders-blasts-trump-what-are-you-afraid-of …
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A Teen 4 Bernie @TeenForBernie 2h2 hours ago
.@realDonaldTrump Give me one good reason why you can't debate? Did you lose your voice or get a vasectomy? #ChickenTrump
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A Teen 4 Bernie @TeenForBernie 2h2 hours ago
Wow. Donald Trump backed out? He's pathetic. I don't know why but I'm disappointed in him. #ChickenTrump
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Joyce Jeffries and 2 others follow
Xavier Pérez @DOUBTMYPROGRESS 2h2 hours ago Manhattan, NY
I found out why @realDonaldTrump is so afraid of @BernieSanders...
#ColonelSanders #ChickenTrump
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Denise ~ Bernie2016 @LostDiva 2h2 hours ago
Denise ~ Bernie2016 Retweeted
Trump managed to insult everyone except #BernieSanders.
#ChickenTrump is the 1%, people. Don't forget it! https://twitter.com/NizamovRus/status/736304593076903936 …
Denise ~ Bernie2016 added,
This Tweet is unavailable.
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jennifer dillon @funkinatrix 2h2 hours ago Kihei, HI
Donald Trump is very concerned about being "appropriate". 😂 Seems legit. 🐓🐔🐤 #ChickenTrump #BernieTrumpDebate
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Europe For Sanders @Europe4Sanders 2h2 hours ago
What sound does #ChickenTrump make? "Bawk, Bawk, Bawkaaaawk, Bawk, Bawk, Bawk, Bawkaaaawk"
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Denise ~ Bernie2016 @LostDiva 2h2 hours ago
#ChickenTrump is no #BirdieSanders!
#ChickenHillary won’t debate #BernieSanders.
1%er don’t care about our issues.
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Jared Rice @CouncilmanRice 2h2 hours ago
#ChickenTrump backs out of the #BernieTrumpDebate. Too bad. California now has nobody willing to discuss the issues with @BernieSanders.
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Turn AR Bernie Blue and 6 others follow
Viva Bernie @vivabernie 2h2 hours ago
Haha @realDonaldTrump is scared of two things a real American Eagle n a real debate w @BernieSanders #ChickenTrump
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US Gun Violence and 15 others follow
RiskyLiberal @RiskyLiberal 2h2 hours ago
.@RealDonaldTrump is now #ChickenTrump. Trump opens his mouth, and lies fall out. What an immature, childish fool #DonTheCon is
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T and 12 others follow
Tallman @Tallman7861 2h2 hours ago
#ChickenTrump is afraid of @berniesaners @realdonalddrump Man-child-baby-hands With bad policy #BERNIEtrumpDEBATE
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PA for Bernie @PA4Sanders 2h2 hours ago Pennsylvania, USA
What do @realDonaldTrump and @HillaryClinton have in common? They're both scared of the strongest candidate. #ChickenTrump
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Xavier Pérez @DOUBTMYPROGRESS 2h2 hours ago Manhattan, NY
If you are a supporter of #ChickenTrump aka @realDonaldTrump, you should be ashamed of your candidate backing out!
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Wednesday, May 25, 2016
Trump, Chicago, Cubs, God
THE ABSURD TIMES
Our Media, Above
More Absurdity Abounds
By
Czar Donic, ed.
I know I promised no more on this election, I know; however, this is the Absurd Times and where better? It is our responsibility to cover the absurd, and nowhere is it more prevalent than here.
Above you see the monopoly on information distribution in the U.S. See, we do not believe in Government control of the media. Well, actually, since these corporations do own the government, perhaps we do, but at least we are not like Russian, eh? Or Egypt? No. We believe in a free press. As free as possible so long as it makes money.
So why is the election covered in such depth on U.S. media? Because it is free programming, that's why. Same with Egypt Air. They do not have to pay royalties to the political candidates and they can charge the same for commercials. In fact, they even charge the candidates for the commercials on top of it all.
Therefore, we hear little about the fascism or National Socialism growing in Ukraine. Say what? You never heard of it? Well, of course not. Who is going to watch that when we have Donald Trump to see and hear? Never mind the few who would rather see a rerun of Barney Miller than pay any attention to Donald Trump. There are many more who are so ill-informed that they will listen to and believe anything he says.
Now he is dragging up the suicide of Vince Foster, someone Hillary Clinton may have had killed while she was first lady. Obama said that after that, Donald will turn his "attention to important things such as uncovering the moon landing fake. Now that is a good and funny line, but then Obama spent 10 years in Chicago so he has a sense of humor.
How do I know? Believe me, everyone who has spent that much time in Chicago has a sense of humor or else has relocated. This is the place that predicts the Cub's winning the World Series of Baseball every year. The last time that happened, man invented the flying machine, later called the airplane. Once, the Cubs made it to the World Series, but a goat cursed them and they lost. Say what? You don't believe that? Well, think about this: a few years running Cubs fans went to Arizona (spring training) and sacrificed goats. See, the reasoning was that if they killed enough goats, the Cubs would win. Right. You don't believe that? Well, you haven't lived 10 years in Chicago, then.
Recent news is about Albuquerque, New Mexico where people rioted outside his rally. Well, everyone has forgotten about when he wanted to hold a rally in Chicago. Essentially, Chicago told him "Forgeddabout it! Outta here! No way!" Trump stayed away. Chicken. Was it because of good taste? Nope. Trump claims to be a Republican and probably is as he is nearly as insane as his fans and Republicans do not fare well in Chicago. That's all.
Crimea? Remember that? The descendants of Genghis Kahn? Actually, they are much better off now, although one was victorious in the Eurovision contest with a song about her grandmother being persecuted by Stalin. Any Fans of Stalin out there?
So it was time today to check out a Donald Trump speech. Sort of like expecting a Cubs victory? First, some person introduced him at length and finished with "God bless America!" He said it as if it were an order, a command. Assuming there is a God, and wondering if there is one why is there a Trump, it leaves questions as to whether God follows orders.
As Trump was speaking, I was reminded very much of when I spent some time writing satire. It was all extemporary, and one was on a very boring sports announcer named Bob Elson. The trouble with that is that boring is very difficult to make funny, and so it soon shifted to a satire on the host of a radio talk show host who was popular. Now the best thing the Cubs ever had was a radio play by play announcer named Jack Quinlin. In fact, he was so good that he won the award for best announcer five years straight. All such announcers are employees of the team and the Cubs moved him from a 5,000 watt station to a 50,000 clear-channel station that at night could be heard from the East coast to the Rockey mountains. In traditional Cubs fashion, he died in a car crash before the sixth season. No, it wasn't him.
The person in mind was called Jack Eigen, a guy who was full of himself. We wanted to name him Jack Ego, but Mike Nichols beat us to it and nobody could top Mike Nichols, so it remained Bob Elson. Elson, during the 60s, would give long monologues on Luke Appling while the game was in progress. This was, indeed, on the radio. The satire took the form of Hockey interviews thinly disguising the names of the players.
So, Trump's speech, what I could tolerate of it, was like Jack Ego reincarnated. The choice the above corporations will leave the U.S. with is Trump or Hillary Clinton. They complain that he will not concede and give up, but he is actually a politician who has constructive ideas, a rarity in American politics.
So, how about Israel? Israel is Jack Eigen. The Kennedy administration made it a law that all radios manufactured in the U.S. (yes, they once were) had the receive both AM and FM stations. The remedy for Israel is not a simple, but individuals can chose not to contribute by not purchasing anything from which it profits. Other postings indicate how to do this.
Das ist alles fÜr Heute.
Labels:
Boycott Israel,
Chicago,
Cubs,
Donald Trump,
God,
Jack Quinlan
Tuesday, May 24, 2016
https://www.facebook.com/ajplusenglish/videos/433144530160393/?hc_location=ufi
https://www.facebook.com/ajplusenglish/videos/433144530160393/?hc_location=ufi
https://www.facebook.com/ajplusenglish/videos/433144530160393/?hc_location=ufi
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