CHICAGO POLITICIANS?

THE ABSURD TIMES

Illustration: Hizzonor:

John McCain has been saying "If I needed any lessons in honesty, I wouldn't ask a Chicago politician. The implication is that Chicago politics is corrupt. The truth is, such is impossible. There is and was no corruption in Chicago Politics. Ever.

Corruption, after all, is a decline from traditionally accepted standards. In Chicago, the standards are clear -- vote right and be treated right. That's it. Lies are not accepted. One mayor, after Richard, called Mike Blandick did lie -- he said the streets were all plowed after a 3 foot snowstorm and they weren't. He left office immediately. One corruption was a (snicker) "reform" candidate called "Calamity Jane," because she actually tried to reform things. Then Harold Washington fit the correct tradition. He died and now Daley's son is in charge and everyone is happy.

To the tune of "John Henry":

When Dick Daley was a little baby
Sittin on his mammies knee,
He took some land in his grubby little hand
Said Chicago will belong to me, lord lord,
Chicago will belong to me.

When Dick Daley was in the first grade,
His future was realized,
Cuz before he got into the Second Grade,
He had the whole damn scholl organized, lord lord,
He had the whole damn school organized.

Now ther's some say he's a grafter,
And a bigger crook there could not be.
But we were proud of our Political guy,
He gave the state to John F. Kennedy, lord lord,
He gave the state to John F. Kennedy.

And I'm proud to say I had a part in it.

Here are a few of his quotes -- see if you can find a single lie in any of them:

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• The policeman isn't there to create disorder; the policeman is there to preserve disorder.^[1]

Said during the civil disorders associated with the Democratic National Convention in 1968.

• I'm not the last of the old bosses. I'm the first of the new leaders.^[2]

• Even the Lord had skeptical members of his party. One betrayed him, one denied him and one doubted him.^[3]

• Fuck you, you Jew son of a bitch, you lousy mother-fucker, go home.^[4]

Said to Senator Abe Ribicoff of Connecticut when the Senator challenged Daley's use of force during the 1968 Democratic National Convention.

• Good government is good politics and politics is good government.^[5]

An ofttimes repeated maxim of Daley's to describe his view on the inseparability of politics and government.

• I have conferred with the superintendent of police this morning and I gave him instructions that an order be issued by him immediately and under his signature to shoot to kill any arsonist or anyone with a Molotov cocktail in his hand.^[4]

Stated one week following the 1968 Chicago riots to the people of Chicago because of his dissatisfaction with the minimum use of force employed by Police Superintendent James B. Conlisk in dealing with rioters.

• They have vilified me, they have crucified me; yes, they have even criticized me.^[6]

A statement he once made in response to criticisms, alluding that he treated criticism on par with vilification and crucifixion.

• If a man can't put his arms around his sons and help them, then what's the world coming to?^[7]

Response to criticism for steering millions of dollars in city insurance to an agency where his son worked.

Here is Wikkipedia discussion:

Democratic Party machine politics

Known for shrewd party politics, Daley was the prototypical machine politician, and his Chicago Democratic Machine, based on control of thousands of patronage positions, was instrumental in bringing a narrow 8,000 vote victory in Illinois for John F. Kennedy in 1960. Many Daley opponents allege that Mayor Daley, JFK, and LBJ stole the 1960 election by stuffing ballot boxes in Texas and rigging the vote in Chicago.

Daley was usually open with the news media, meeting with them for frequent news conferences, and taking all questions – if not answering all of them. According to columnist and biographer Mike Royko, Daley got along better with editors and publishers than with reporters.

Daley had limited opposition among the 50 aldermen of the Chicago City Council. For the most part, the aldermen supported Daley and the official party position consistently, except for a small number of Republicans from the German wards on the northwest side of the city and a small number of independents (a group that grew during Daley's mayoralty to represent groups that felt disenfranchised by Daley's policies).

Daley's chief means of attaining electoral success was his reliance on the local precinct captain, who marshaled and delivered votes on a neighborhood-by-neighborhood basis. Many of these precinct captains held patronage jobs with the city, mostly minor posts at low pay. Each ward had a ward leader in charge of the precinct captains, some of whom were corrupt. The notorious First Ward (encompassing downtown, which had many businesses but few residents) was tied to the local mafia or crime syndicate, but Daley's own ward was supposedly clean and his personal honesty was never questioned successfully primarily because he controlled all levels of the government and media that could have questioned him.

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He was even a Republican once, but he straighten out later.