After all, better nude than sorry, right? Well, actually, haven't you noticed that Amerikans are getting fatter and fatter all the time? What you see above is about as likely as, well, a sense of proper priorities from an Amerikan President.
Since you brought up sex, a lead newsreader from F** news pointed out that Tiger Woods would be able to recover if he accepted Jesus Christ as his savior. See, he might be a Bhuddist, his mother was, we know that, and only in Xtianity is forgiveness possible. Of course, I don't think that Bhuddism blames people in the first place so they can hardly forgive. Insanely enough, the only place that Brit Hume was corrected on that was on ABC radio and the F** Business channel (with all of its 320 viewers) by Don Imus!
Of course, you know, that, with the sort of "screening" illustrated above, the most recent bomber, or would be bomber, or alledged bomber, or black guy (you'll give them that much, won't you?), would not have been detected. At least the bomb stuff would not have.
Still, Obama managed to snap into action. He had more drones attack in Afghanistan and is planning to attack Yemen. That'll do it.
Dallas Cheerleaders Will Now Be Wearing Bikini Thongs Instead of Short Shorts
============================================================================= DALLAS - It has been announced that due to the thousands of emails, text messages, and phone calls that he has been receiving lately, a top football team decided to drop the cheerleaders standard white short shorts and replace them with white bikini thongs.
Jones said that he has informed the director of the cheerleaders that the new cheerleader outfit will be implemented at the next home game.
Get the full story: http://www.thespoof.com/news/spoof.cfm?headline=s4i65966
Please note: The above is entirely fictitious.
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